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susy
journeyman
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Reged: 04/15/08
Posts: 84
Does it matter who files?
      #398155 - 05/04/08 05:51 PM

My husband of close to thirty years decided he wanted his freedom. He constantly picked fights with me but would not file so I finally did the dirty deed. Does it matter who files in Louisiana?

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googledad
Carpal \'Tunnel
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Reged: 12/31/05
Posts: 10213
Re: Does it matter who files? [Re: susy]
      #398188 - 05/04/08 08:55 PM

No .

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Relayer
Carpal \'Tunnel
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Reged: 03/13/07
Posts: 9506
Loc: Moorglade Mover
Re: Does it matter who files? [Re: googledad]
      #399668 - 05/07/08 05:20 PM

[quote]No . [/quote]

I disagree.

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icwal
enthusiast


Reged: 11/19/07
Posts: 334
Re: Does it matter who files? [Re: Relayer]
      #399673 - 05/07/08 05:26 PM

I also disagree

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googledad
Carpal \'Tunnel
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Reged: 12/31/05
Posts: 10213
Re: Does it matter who files? [Re: Relayer]
      #399757 - 05/07/08 11:52 PM

With the bare , pitiful info supplied by OP how can you disagree ?

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Careful. We don't want to learn from this.


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Relayer
Carpal \'Tunnel
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Reged: 03/13/07
Posts: 9506
Loc: Moorglade Mover
Re: Does it matter who files? [Re: googledad]
      #399778 - 05/08/08 06:16 AM

I mean in general and from a psychological standpoint. Obviously not a legal on but someone is always the respondant and it give you an edge.

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sunnyday
member


Reged: 05/16/07
Posts: 150
Re: Does it matter who files? [Re: Relayer]
      #399921 - 05/08/08 10:49 AM

I agree with Relayer- After years of being treated poorly ( thats an understatment :) ) I finally got up the courage to ask him for a divorce. He actually at the time admitted to alot of the things he had done to me. I helped him find a place and move. He filed divorce papers. I didnt care. Then his mood swings kicked in and he went around telling everyone he had divorced me. If thats what makes him happy so be it because I know the truth so I try and not let it bother me.

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DeeCee
addict
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Reged: 10/08/07
Posts: 420
Re: Does it matter who files? [Re: sunnyday]
      #407957 - 06/01/08 10:38 AM

Here's my feelings..I too went through (verbal abuse and constant badgering by the stbx) and really, I was told by a few lawyers..let him file. And not to move out. If he is physical CALL the cops immediately. Because that is proof. Get Reports. but years of just yelling and being spoken down to and fights does not warrant cops being called in. Financially I could not file first because I knew he would exactly what he is doing now. Drag it out. So my only hope at the time was if he files first (which he did) he would MAYBE might want to drag and drag it out. Because it looks more like he is trying to pressure me by excessive delaying.

While at the court waiting for my case to be called up to the judge I saw a woman (through her interpreter) explain to the judge the years of physical abuse she had experienced by her husband. I nearly cried upon hearing her detail it. AND guess what..the judge flatly told her that it did not matter at this stage of pre-trial / settling phase and the judged asked her did she file any reports. The woman said yes..but still the judge's overall reaction was apatheic. The only thing that seems to matter is proving what your entitled too. The abuse is almost a non-issue. Which is sad. You practically have to be near death from an abusive spouse for it to matter.


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