brokenmommy
newbie
Reged: 06/17/08
Posts: 25
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Totally lost here and my lawyer won't answer me. HOw do I find a mediator? Is one granted to you by court on your D-day? I'd like to take EX to a mediation to solve our conflict over custody. We have not made any legal arrangements, and the court has not issued anything. (We haven't been to court yet).
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babyn76
newbie
Reged: 06/17/08
Posts: 42
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I picked up the phone and started asking around.. We came to angreement w/ mediation.. The judge actually said he wouldn't hear our case until we went and at least tried to come to some kind of agreement.. but that is in Tx. Now if you can get the X to agree to go, then you can probably tell the judge that... if you're appt with the mediator falls AFTER your court date..I would DEFINITLY try to get one sched. BEFORE the court date though.. My experience is if you DON'T have a lawyer.. which I ended up firing mine and going to meniation solo.. mediation is a very positive choice.. (the mediator doesn't have an agenda unlike most lawyers) * also, I only had to pay 400 bucks fora half day session.. MUCH cheaper than a lawyer!! Hope that helps!
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Vivian_R
recently joined
Reged: 05/25/08
Posts: 6
Loc: Florida
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Mediation is a voluntary process. That means that both you AND your ex-husband must agree to mediate.
In many states, you can have your attorney request a referral to mediation. This means that the court will order both of you to attend mediation. But attending doesn't necessarily mean your ex will mediate; it means he must at least show up to the mediation.
If you do get the court to refer you to mediation, many family courts have a mediation unit; others have a roster of available mediators, and you and your ex (through your attorneys) choose one.
The other way for you and your ex to get to mediator, is for each of you to agree to go, and again you and your respective attorneys can choose the mediator. You don't have to wait for the court to do anything for you both to go to mediation.
Most states keep a roster of mediators, including by area (such as family, civil, county, etc.) You can search your state's court sites to see if they have links to any such state roster.
Hope that helps.
Vivian R
-------------------- Fl Family Mediator
www.fldivorcemediation.com
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WINGS
recently joined
Reged: 02/23/09
Posts: 2
Loc: S FL
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Hello, newbie here........ !! It is mentioned to consult our "respective atty' ..... I thought mediation meant not having to use atty (cost) At this point I do not have an atty, but want to learn about mediation to be able to effectively present this to my ex....
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Maury
Carpal \'Tunnel

Reged: 06/02/04
Posts: 8146
Loc: This Asylum --->
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"I thought mediation meant not having to use atty (cost)"
That is not what it means at all. Mediation is a system that brings the parties together to negotiate a viable resolution by agreement with a qualified neutral party filtering the information and, in some cases, playing devil's advocate. It can be conducted with or without counsel, as the parties agree.
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WINGS
recently joined
Reged: 02/23/09
Posts: 2
Loc: S FL
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If you are not using attorneys, how do you go about obtaining a mediator......and actually filing? I have been separated for nearly a year, and it is time to proceed. We are civil, this was my idea in the first place. I dont know what to expect when this gets underway, personalities can change, especially injured ones. I think I'd like to have a mediator "ready" when it all starts.......do you "interview" to see if you would want to work with that person? Are mediators rated in any way? Call me Newbie, I have never done this before.......
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