tsl
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 06/24/04
Posts: 2274
|
|
Would you take your child's younger half-sibling in, under your roof, for a while under these circumstances?
1. The biofather abondoned your child. Agreed to a stepparent adoption only to avoid going to jail (or so he thought).
2. The half-sib lives with BF & BM (but they "aren't an item", BM uses it as a place to stay).
3. BF won't work, trying to get disability on a wrist issue.
Has been turned down. Refuses to work.
4. BM works but half-heartedly. Had job until last week. But it was not steady job, she knew it going in but stopped looking for something permanent.
5. BM already had 1 child that her folks are raising (not my X's child).
6. BM called me stating they are being evicted. Have till 9AM on July 1st.
7. BM says has no where to go, no one to turn to. I don't really care about her or X, but do for this child's welfare.
BM is afraid child will end up in foster care system. She doesn't want that.
9. As neither has a job, neither has a place to live...
10. X's money well finally ran dry & is refusing to give him money again.
11. And you know, from past history, that there is a chance that this won't be temporary as BM says. (I have kept half-sibling, with specific time for her to get child & whe won't show up for hours...even days later.)
Would you take in your child's half-sibling under these circumstances? If so, what paperwork would you have done?
Would you wait like, 2 or 3 weeks then do paperwork or do it immediately?
--------------------
Duct tape can't fix stupid but it can keep them out of the way."
|
Redlegg
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 10/05/06
Posts: 26679
|
|
To me, there is no question, I would take the child in for as long as the child needed it. I would do the paperwork immediately to protect myself and the child if need be. The paperwork would depend on the situation, but guardianship, Power of Attorney, whatever was warranted, I would do it.
|
BB1
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 10/26/05
Posts: 8051
Loc: MD
|
|
My oldest sister's now ex was a drug dealer on a very large scale. He rarely ever came home, cheated and just lived a life of absolutely no morals. He had 2 kids with a drug head girl. He ended up in jail. She ended up bouncing from house to house. My sister was awarded full custody of the 2 children he had with the drug-head. She's had them for well over 10 years now....maybe for 15. She takes them to see their maternal grandmother 1x a month. She doesn't get one penny for them from the parents or the state. She just took them in and raised them because she didn't want to see her kids half-bro and half-sis in foster care.
If it were me, no I wouldn't do it. My sister is way more kind than I am.
--------------------
It's a dog-eat-dog world, and I'm wearing Milk Bone underwear.
|
PrincessJ
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/25/07
Posts: 7176
Loc: 39.10 degrees North 94.58 degr...
|
|
Yes.
--------------------
I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it.
--Jack Handey
|
Becky
addict
Reged: 06/01/04
Posts: 434
Loc: New Hampshire
|
|
I would. I would also have them sign guardianship papers for you.
--------------------
My choice is what I choose to do and if Im causing no harm it shouldnt bother you.
|
Avaya
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 02/09/06
Posts: 9816
Loc: Arkansas
|
|
We would take SD's other half sibling under almost ANY circumstances. I guess the only exception would be if she had become a dangerous person or was addicted to something.
--------------------
Eternity is too long to be wrong.
|
Spring
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/02/04
Posts: 7972
|
|
I would say likely, yes....but see a lawyer first to get advice.
--------------------
Never consider the possibility of failure; as long as you persist, you will be successful.
|
arvm
journeyman
Reged: 05/05/07
Posts: 88
|
|
I would say yes. I would suggest that you get them to give you temporary custody. File the paperwork, get the ball rolling.
My Aunt (now deceased) would sometimes drop off her 2 kids with us volunatarily, sometimes the state would call. In hindsight, my parents wished that they had followed through and gotten Guardinship of the kids, but they stayed their hand due to emotional reasons. The upheaval that the kids went through was heart-breaking. My Aunt was a drug and alcohol addict, she finally died of her addiction a couple of years ago. I miss her still. Its tough for kids to grow up like that.
|
elliesmom
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 11/07/05
Posts: 8835
|
|
I would say yes (and not because I know its not possible as BM has had a hyst. and no other children), if only because I know the heartache it would cause a child to see a sibling lost that way. And when they are adults - I know my responsible youngins would feel like they needed to help whatever trainwreck the abandoned siblings had become. Why not prevent it (or at least try to) by raising them with your kids to be like them, ya know?
--------------------
Forgiveness is...letting go of the hope that the past can be changed.
|
KrazyKat
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 04/05/07
Posts: 1714
Loc: Somewhere in the Middle
|
|
Yes... BUT, you definately need guardianship paperwork started immediately!
That way YOU can do all things like school, doctors, etc. without having to have the bio-parents permission every single time.
It can be done simply through a lawyer. My sister granted me as Legal Guardian over her child when she first became ill with Cancer. The father was/is no where around. Abandoned the child and she had sole legal custody with no father rights. (His choice)
We went to a lawyer and filled out some paperwork naming me as joint legal guardian with my sister which gave me legal parenting rights. It was also stipulated that upon her death, I gained sole legal custody of the child as well. Because I was already the legal guardian, it was an easier process to become the Full Legal Guardian.
Definately talk to a lawyer about becoming the children's Guardian. It will save you all the headache/heartache in the long run. Especially since these people do not seem to be very stable financially, physically or emotionally. It will be the best gift you could ever give to the children. Plus, if they have no medical (which if both parents aren't working, it's assumed they have no medical) as a Legal Guardian you can add them to your medical / dental plan if necessary. Most plans (not all) allow you to add additional children at no extra cost. Our plan it doesn't matter if there is 1 child or 6. It's still the same cost to have the child(ren) on there.
Just putting some things out there to consider. As I've been there...
--------------------
If you have a problem, build a bridge and get over it!
|
Previous
Index
Next
Threaded
Edit
Reply
Quote
