mmarks
recently joined
Reged: 08/28/08
Posts: 5
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Hi all. I need advise. Situation: Married to Marine (LtCol) for 8 plus years. He has 3 other bio children I was raising and I have 2 other (raising). We have 1 together (elememtary school age). He seems to have had this seperation planned for some time lol. He moved out 2 months ago. Our child lives with me and visits him reguarly. Neither of us gets child support from formers. My olderst is 18 and his oldest will be 18 shortly. He has a settlement drawn up and is pushy for a signature. Not my style. He had given me enough money to see a lawyer three short times. Since his move, We receive a total of 2,500 monthly from him. I have been a stay at home mom due to the fact that it was financialy and desirably to our benefit. I now have job apps in to fit our childs school hours. To say the least, I am drowning financially and I am not a spender. We do not own a home. I remained in the rental we have had for approx 7 yrs. Rents are high in Nova. During our marriage he was able to almost complete his masters (he is holding out on the last couple classes). I began college for a two yr degree while he was in Iraq for a few months(he volunteered & made steps to begin our seperation once there)but he refuses to finance it. Im on hold now. I will get to many questions in time here and boy do I need advise. Im logical enough to be on this form so ive been doing my homework. But Im stumped on fact and hearsay. He has seen almost every jag on the bases local. Bumping me out lol. He is at 22 yrs. Retires in two months. He was supposed to retire already but changed it because I would not sign papers in march while we stil lived together. Says he is thinking of changing it again. Q: (Bah is 2,745.)Am I only intitled to 2/3 of that and does that cover child support and spousal support? If I asked the court for a temp order (?) would I be able to get more help from him? And is there a way I could get him to pay a lawyer for me? Ive never felt so cornered! However, I will not sign a thing because I feel he is undercutting us wanting me to agree to 2,500 monthly. If i'm wrong, please tell me. I have many other questions that i'd like to post. Thank you for any facts.
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Redlegg
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 10/05/06
Posts: 26686
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Read this, it may help and go see JAG if you want to, they will only give advice and cannot represent anyone in divorce so you are not bumped out.
http://sja.hqmc.usmc.mil/jal/FamilySupport/files/15.pdf
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Miranda
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/02/05
Posts: 20822
Loc: North of Mexico
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If he is retiring in 60 days, I fail to see the reason to worry about BAH.
If you have seen three lawyer and he paid for all three visits you should have come to some sort of conclusion by now.
If I read correctly you have two other child whom you support without assistance from your ex. Working around the schedule of a school aged child is a luxury most single parents of three are not afforded.
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13.1...because I am only half crazy!
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mmarks
recently joined
Reged: 08/28/08
Posts: 5
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my concern for bah is that he might not retire as planned. Previous to our marriage I worked around my childrens school schedules and will continue to do so.It is indeed wonderful to be able to raise ones own children in this world today. I want to stay in this state (im aware of the laws pertaining to leaving) so that our child may have both parents close by eachother. However, it is costly here. To clarify: I have seen one lawyer 3 times. Total of almost 3 hours. My questions could not be answered in that time. On my third visit my lawyer advised me to take husbands proposed amount of ----. Funny thing was, I didnt tell him what that amount was, he told me. I had given him my husbands lawyers name. I guess they decided what I would be getting. Thing is I want our settlement to be fair. It isnt. I havent looked to bring into it his longterm 'friend'. I want to end it peacefuly and fairly but I am angry that he planned it, and left me with nothing but bills and car loan etc etc. Thanks anyhow
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mmarks
recently joined
Reged: 08/28/08
Posts: 5
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Thank you. I will look at the sight. My days start very early so ill post any questions then. He saw all the Jags on the local bases. Ive tried to get into see them and was explained that. Is this incorrect? Must they see me too?
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matart1
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 09/01/05
Posts: 2798
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JAG will do nothing for either one of you in your divorce. you can get advice but it will not go any further and you will only be referred to a lawyer in town so to speak.
divorce is a civilian function in the court of law, not military.
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Life is a long lesson in humility.
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Redlegg
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 10/05/06
Posts: 26686
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Jag will explain any military laws or Marine Corps regulations that affect you/him while seperated, but they do not and can not represent you, and they can give advice to you as well as him. Whomever explained it to you seems to not have explained JAG's function very well.
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Miranda
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/02/05
Posts: 20822
Loc: North of Mexico
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The husband has already seen the JAG though right? So, they will likely NOT see her.
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13.1...because I am only half crazy!
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Redlegg
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 10/05/06
Posts: 26686
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Why would JAG not talk to her????
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Miranda
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/02/05
Posts: 20822
Loc: North of Mexico
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[quote]Why would JAG not talk to her???? [/quote]
If her husband went there first, it is no different than if they saw the same lawyer. At least that is how it works in the Air Force.
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13.1...because I am only half crazy!
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