youngatheart
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 09/03/05
Posts: 9394
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DEAR ABBY: My ex-wife recently remarried and has decided to keep my last name and hyphenate it with her new husband's. She says she's doing it "for the sake of our children."
I don't buy that for a minute, Abby. She was unfaithful many times during our marriage, and I want her to stop using my name so some dignity and honor can be restored to it.
Do you agree that she should drop my name, or does she have a right to it? -- WANTS MY NAME BACK IN MAINE
DEAR WANTS: Although I understand your anger, try to take comfort in the fact that your ex still finds prestige in the association with you. Honor and dignity will be restored to your name by the way you and the children conduct yourselves in the future.
P.S. As long as your ex is not trying to defraud anyone, she has the right to use the name you gave her. Accept it and move on.
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GRRRR....this line, "try to take comfort in the fact that your ex still finds prestige in the association with you." drives me freaking bat sh!t. My name is mine...I keep it because it's mine...I don't keep it for any "prestige in the association with ex". BLECH!
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Avaya
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 02/09/06
Posts: 9816
Loc: Arkansas
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She isn't doing that for prestige, she's doing it as a deliberate dig! LOLLOL
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Eternity is too long to be wrong.
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Sherron
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 11/25/06
Posts: 20056
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Why do you feel this way, Avaya?
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onerose
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 12/30/05
Posts: 3151
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hmmm, I still use my ex's last name on any school related issues with my kids. I myself don't much like it either, but it is so much easier.
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youngatheart
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 09/03/05
Posts: 9394
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Why would you think it has anything to do with him?
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JennyLynn
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 07/14/05
Posts: 31656
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I don't think it's a deliberate dig at all. Many people keep their married name, as it can be a pain in the butt to change it, especially if they were married for a long time.
I still have my exhusband's last name, although it will be changed next year when SO and I get married. But had we been married a long time, I may have done the same thing.
Personally I don't like having my exhusband's last name, and I don't mind that my last name will be different than DS's. But I can see why some people would do that.
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Cassie23
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 10/07/05
Posts: 14714
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I would love to see BM get married again and hyphenate all of her names :)
She may be doing it to piss him off. I know BM gave one of her kids our last name (because it was the last name she kept after they divorced), because she was mad at the father of her child (for breaking up with her) so she refused to give the child her Dad's last name. It does help her situation some, because people don't know right away that all her kids have different fathers- they think SD and the one right after have the same Dad.
I would never hyphenate two married names UNLESS my nature of business called for it.
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JennyLynn
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 07/14/05
Posts: 31656
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Mine's still legally my X's last name, but most people refer to me by my maiden name. At work it's hyphenated, although not legally. Actually my boss made a joke a couple of months ago, asked if when I remarry, will it be Jennifer S-F-P. Haha. No, just P :).
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mmgirlsmom
member
Reged: 10/16/08
Posts: 104
Loc: Missouri
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I planned on keeping my ex's last name and hyphenating it with my new last name primarily because of my kids. I mean, I guess I could just sign using my ex's last name when it comes to my kids. It has nothing to do with taking a dig at my ex, I thought it would be best for my kids.
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Life is like a box of chocolates you never know what youre gonna get!
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Cassie23
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 10/07/05
Posts: 14714
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Yeah, I just think it would be strange two want two hyphenated married names. On BM's FB she is ____ (my last name)-(married last name), she doesn't have her maiden name at all. She had no business connections when she was a (my last name), so I don't know the point of that?
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