youngatheart
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 09/03/05
Posts: 9394
|
|
I have been holding out hope that things on this board would change for the better, but that doesn't seem likely to happen anytime soon.
Years ago, I came to this board because I didn't have support or an outlet to vent our frustrations related to my divorce/Ex without it coloring my kid's world. While others might have disagreed with my viewpoints or beliefs, I found that I always either learned something through posting, or solidified my belief that I was doing what was right. Either way, it was a positive I needed in my life.
Today, this board would chase off a newbie. Why on Earth would someone want this to be a place of refuge for them? Instead, someone who comes to this board finds infighting and bickering that should only happen with freaking Junior High girls. And it's on both sides of the aisle. Neither side is in the right, and no one seems willing to walk away. For whatever reason, this seems to be fun for some.
This place has become toxic for all who are on it. And it's sad because it once helped many. So, like with the toxicity in my family, I feel it's best that I sever ties. Maybe someday I'll check back in and the drama will be gone, but I won't hold my breath. Some people seem unable to let go of anything or grow up.
I truly wish you all health and happiness and peace.
|
Terri1
journeyman
Reged: 06/03/05
Posts: 71
|
|
I never post and rarely reply because others always seem to have great help quicker than I can get to it. I have found great assistance and ignore the really strange stuff that gets started here sometimes. I think people have forgotten why someone, at some point, designed this site. It is for divorce help. I think that if people stuck to that topic, ignored completely those people that they don't think have good advice and completely ignored the strange stuff that gets started sometimes, there would not be a problem. Even really crazy people eventually realize that they can't fight by themselves. They keep it up only when they get the attention they so desire.
People that have been helped by others are in the best position to pass their wisdom on. I think the best thing any of the helpful people can do is continue to help and ignore the rest. For those that just can't help themselves, probably it is time to go.
|
Maury
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/02/04
Posts: 8146
Loc: This Asylum --->
|
|
Self reflection is a difficult thing. As a result, as is the usual case, most people will read your words and recognize that it pertains to someone else.
;-)
|
ssmom79
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/27/07
Posts: 7783
|
|
Thanks for sharing Terri. I'm not going anywhere. I will play in the sandbox myself sometimes but I try to separate myself from the drama. People still come here for advice and I'd love to help someone who might be where I've been or even learn a better way to handle a situation in my personal life.
I would never have let go of the things I grudgingly held against BM had I not come to this site. I would not be in the position I'm in today. I hope others can get the same help.
|
Cassie23
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 10/07/05
Posts: 14714
|
|
Thanks Terri for your insight I do agree.
I also agree with you ssmom- if it wasn't for some I wouldn't have realized how **I** needed to change in a blended/step family.
You can't change someone else, only yourself. You have to start from there because that is the only person you can control. :)
|
gr8Dad
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/07/04
Posts: 30195
|
|
Lets be honest, this place is NO different than it was many many years ago, and through the years, you have just SEEN a whole lot more on here than you had seen before coming here. It has ALWAYS been like this. There are the bullies (No advice, just attacks), there are the legal eagles (great advice, nothing extra) and the rest of us, who fall somewhere in between.
And since it IS the same, nothing is going to change. So, as Terri said, ignore the trolls, jump in and feed them occasionally for sport if you like (and yes, I do LIKE occassionally to feed the trolls), and help if you can.
FTR, I was told in a PM once by an individual who shall remain nameless that when I first came on here, quite a few people thought I worked for DS, and was only on here to get people riled up and draw traffic to the site. I WISH I had thought of that, as I would have made my services available in that regard.
--------------------
Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...
|
Maury
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/02/04
Posts: 8146
Loc: This Asylum --->
|
|
LOL -- I remember being told that you worked for DS. That was back in the early E ric days.
|
Miranda
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/02/05
Posts: 20822
Loc: North of Mexico
|
|
Great advice Terri. Some of us get too wrapped up and invested in the nonsense on this site.
--------------------
13.1...because I am only half crazy!
|
Dee78
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/02/05
Posts: 11820
Loc: TN
|
|
I agree Gr8dad, I got caught up in the drama once upon a time but life is too short for that. Maybe I just have a life now and don't feel the need to get that involved here. I am on FB if anyone wants to add me, after reading the thread below I did "turn off" my friends list.
I will continue to "lurk" here. It can provide comic relief at times.
--------------------
Sarcasm helps keep you from telling people what you really think of them.
|
Miranda
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/02/05
Posts: 20822
Loc: North of Mexico
|
|
What is "turning off friends list"? I don't do facebook, and after seeing the threads am thankful for it!! Too time consuming.
--------------------
13.1...because I am only half crazy!
|
Previous
Index
Next
Threaded
Edit
Reply
Quote
