angel549
member
Reged: 05/25/07
Posts: 127
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My 8 year old is struggling in math, has a tutor at school, etc. Florida has what they call FCAT tests that start in 3rd grade. If the child fails the FCAT, they are held back. My daughter gets mostly A's , except in math. The test has a math portion, and a language portion.
Well, my ex TELLS me he is taking her out of school to NJ for a distant relatives wedding for 7 days. A WEEK PRIOR TO THIS HUGE STATE TEST!
I am shocked. Not only is it during my parenting time (he is more than happy to let me make it up), but the week out of school is CRAZY for a wedding.
If my daughter was doing great in math, I would not be concerned. My ex informed me he would discuss it with the teacher, and if the teacher says she can go, than he doesn't care what I think. Wow.
We have joint legal custody.
Just seems he is putting visitation with his family above her schooling. I think it is wonderful for her to vacation with them. But not before a big standardized test, in the middle of the school year. Do I have a say, really?
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Runswithscissors
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 05/29/04
Posts: 13381
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While you have joint...is it joint legal and physical? Who is the primary parent?
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angel549
member
Reged: 05/25/07
Posts: 127
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We have joint legal. I am the resident parent. We have 60/40. (I have my daughter 60%)
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SRS
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 11/05/10
Posts: 2161
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A week before a big test is mostly spent cramming. Not learning.....
If the teacher is for it, I'd step back and let it happen.
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Cassie23
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 10/07/05
Posts: 14714
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5 days out of school for a student that struggles is ridiculous. Furthermore, in the school districts we have lived in you need a darn good reason to be out of school for 7 days- a wedding wouldn't cut it. Our school district(s) have been known to not give make-up work or tests. I wouldn't give my permission- and with "joint" don't both parents have to agree?
Edited by Cassie23 (02/11/12 02:29 PM)
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MrsB
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 07/03/10
Posts: 6355
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Yeah..I'm with you and Cassie....big fat NO.
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Dee78
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/02/05
Posts: 11820
Loc: TN
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7 days unexcused absence warrants a truancy meeting downtown here. I allowed T to miss 4 days to go to Disney and had to have a meeting at the school. It was not before any tests and the teachers gave her the work before she left and she turned it in the day she went back but it was still considered unexcused.
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Sarcasm helps keep you from telling people what you really think of them.
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MrsB
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 07/03/10
Posts: 6355
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Unless it's a school function or emergency - a week of missing school shouldn't be excused IMO. A few days for a special occasion - sure, but sure as heck NOT an entire week especially when the child is having issues in math and has a week immediately when she returns back to school after vacationing for a week.
For the life of me I don't get how the parent can support this...if they want the child there that bad, they should shorten the length of the trip so the child can only miss maybe one or two days, if even that, and be there the rest of the week in school to prepare for the exam coming up. And I'm not even sure I'd agree to that - it would depend - but that would be the most I'd possibly be willing to go.
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Debi
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/03/05
Posts: 7136
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Is there anything in your CO or in the state statutes about "final decision making"?
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When we were together, you said you'd die for me. Now, I think it's time you kept your promise.
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MrsB
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 07/03/10
Posts: 6355
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Debi - I would think since it falls on her time, it's her decision anyway? I can see some ways around that if it were a school event or a type of function listed in the CO as superceding the regular visitation schedule...doubt weddings are included in that though:).
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