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Reged: 10/29/05
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What do you think about something like this.
      #777502 - 02/12/12 04:35 PM

I have thought hard about posting this, and have even talked to a few posters here about posting this. This has been something that has been building up for almost a year,and I didnt know how people would react to something like this as I've never seen anything like this here, but it all came to ahead Thursday and I just need to talk about it.

This is not about me, but a very close family member.

Here are some background facts because I know there will be questions.

BM and BD were married and divorced when their son was 2 years old. BM married again within 6 months and before the son was 3. BD started dating and moved in with GF after a year. BD and GF got married after living together for 7 years and are still married. BM and SD were married for 12 years and divorced last year. BM remarried within 3 months and is now planning on moving out of state with her new husband.....but is leaving her son behind.

He is now almost 16. He has stated that he want's to live with his SD#1 and BM is all for this. BD told his son he wanted him to live with him and the son told him he would run away or make his fathers life a living h#ll if he didnt go along with what he wanted.

Now for how custody was. When the BM and BD divorced they agreed to 50/50. True 50/50, no CS and no carrying clothes back and forth, each home had everything that was needed. When the son was around 11 there was a custody fight and the BD finally gave in and agreed to EOWE and CS. This was not the order of the court but was worked out between the parents, stepparents, the child and a court appointed Dr of Psychiatry. All envolved had sessions alone, then as a group. The Dr had suggested keeping things as they where at that time, but the son stated to the BD what he would do if that came to pass so the BD gave in and agreed to what the BM and son wanted.

Now fast forward and the BM went and signed all her rights over to the SD#1 and agreed to pay him 1/2 child support and the BD would pay the other half. The BD has mixed feelings on this. He knows and understands that his son is close to SD#1, that it really messed with his sons head when the BM and SD divorced. The SD#1 has remarried and the son was in the wedding, they are that close. But he wanted his son to live with him, but the son would hear none of this and made his threats as to what he would do if forced to do this.

So they went before the judge this past week.....what would you have done if you had been the BD? Would you ever agree to allowing your child to live with a former spouse or agree to signing over all rights to that former spouse? Would you as a mother or father give full custody to a stepparent? Would you give in to what your child wanted or force them to live with you and take the chance of them running off or even worse?

I will give the outcome later.

Thanks for reading, I know this was long and I did leave out alot there was no way I could have posted everything, but I will try to answer any questions.

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