I'm looking for some tips as to how to do this. We live in Indiana.
I am getting a divorce from my husband. We would have been married 3 years in June, with our son turning 3 at the end of July. During the time we have been together he has been physically violent to me twice, and verbally and emotionally many more than that. He has not worked more than a couple of weeks since November of '01, and has never been able to maintain a job. He has been diagnosed with depression, though one place we were going to for therapy diagnosed him as bi-polar. His manic episodes, if it is in fact bi-polar, are not invincibility, but anger. We have holes in our walls from where he has lost his temper, and has been taken into protective custody and taken to the hospital twice. The second time we were being a little proactive, because he'd just had a blow up a couple of days before, and we found out CPS was called regarding our son, and we wanted to avoid further problems. He also gets really upset, snide, and nasty, when I get together with friends who happen to be guys, and my interests and hobbies tend to be very male-dominated, as well as the fact that I work in IT.
We are doing some couples councelling, but I am not confident at all about things working out, and really don't want things to. He as agreed that I will have custody of our son. For right now, we are still living together, as I want to keep things as stable for our son as possible, and my son is very attatched to my husband. He is a good father to him over all, but there are many issues. I was also laid off from work in March, and am still unemployed. Trying to find a job, get our son to daycare, and take care of everything around here on my own would be very difficult, especially as we don't have a car, so depend on the bus for everything. Neither of us have any family, or really many close friends, aound here.
My questions are:
What are my options for making him move out of the apartment, or to move out myself, when I reach the point that I am ready for this step? Do I have to give the landlords and/or him 30 days notice? How much of the condition of the apartment am I going to be responsible for?
Our federal tax return, a sizable sum, went towards paying off some school loans he has defaulted on. He admitted to never intending to pay them off. He earned none of the money for this year. Can I depend on getting that money myself though filing an injured spouse claim?
Will I be responsible for any alimony for him? Is there any chance of having child support ordered? He is capable of working, just unwilling.
Is there any ways of documenting the abuse? There are records from the councelling we have done, both joint and separate. Can these be used in court?
|