jane433
recently joined
Reged: 07/21/06
Posts: 10
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Having husband always tell me divorced, need help.
07/21/06 03:56 PM
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Hi, I'm a new comer, from new york, Here is my story, need support and advices, thank you.
I will be married for 3 years in november this year,we have no kids, I am 29 years old, my husband is 35, he is an american, I moved from Hong Kong to here to marry him, I met my husband on the dating website, we met a couple of times in canada, then he decided to bring me here to get married. our marriage haven't been good since we got married, we have a lot of rough time, we always have an arguement and fight about something little, in average we argue 2 times a week, and our arguement always lasts a few days even a week, there are some moment we are happy, but most of time we are not happy. we have tried so many times to work things out,to compromise things, marrige counseling....etc ,at the first year i felt my husband still wanted to work things out, he still treated me good, second year he brought a house, we moved to the new house, i feel he has changed from the very nice person to the person who wasn't the one I married to, became very abusive verbally when we argue, short-tempered, and sometimes impossible to talk to, one more important thing is that " HE OFTEN TELL ME TO GET DIVORCED ", if i don't change myself.
I have to admit that I have my own issues , I'am short-tempered,I always get mad at him over something little, but i have been changing myself to become a better person, yet not 100% perfect what he wants me to change, he blamed 90% fault on me, he think my personality is bad, he said he can't deal with me anymore....etc.
I feel he always has something new to tell me to change when we argue, he will say " If you don't change, then I don't want this marriage,it's up to you. " and i am always the one has to go to talk to him to make him stay in this marriage. i feel i can't take this too long - being have him to tell me divorce all the time, i don't want to keep going to talk to him stay in this marriage, meanwhile i love him, and he said he loves me, i don't want to get divorce, i have so much struggle at this point, i am going to be insane if the situation keep going on like this.
I tried to talk to my family, but all they do just tell me to get divorced with him, he is not worth for me to stay with...etc, i don't feel it's helping me feel better or making me feel what is the best for me...so I am hoping here I can get some advices and courage to make a decision - " stay or go " ?
I also have some concerns IF I do get divorced :
1) I never work here, I am afraid I will not be able to support myself, and will lower the standard of living which i am having now.
2) Right now I don't have my driving licence, since I haven't moved to the USA too long, and not yet a US citizen until next year, but I'm a permenant resident.
3) IF we get divorce, we will have to live in the same house until i am able to self-sufficient.
what should I do now????? 
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Having husband always tell me divorced, need help.
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jane433
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07/21/06 03:56 PM
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Re: Having husband always tell me divorced, need help.
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Tabitha
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07/24/06 03:48 PM
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Re: Having husband always tell me divorced, need help.
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jane433
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07/24/06 05:01 PM
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Re: Having husband always tell me divorced, need help.
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matilda
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07/24/06 10:34 AM
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Re: Having husband always tell me divorced, need help.
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jane433
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07/24/06 02:53 PM
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Re: Having husband always tell me divorced, need help.
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matilda
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07/24/06 04:04 PM
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Re: Having husband always tell me divorced, need help.
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jane433
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07/24/06 05:23 PM
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Re: Having husband always tell me divorced, need help.
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matilda
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07/24/06 06:06 PM
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Re: Having husband always tell me divorced, need help.
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Maury
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07/24/06 11:15 PM
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Re: Having husband always tell me divorced, need help.
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rocketgirl
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07/25/06 06:20 AM
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Re: Having husband always tell me divorced, need help.
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jane433
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07/24/06 02:20 PM
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