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Divorce Source Community Forums >> Domestic Violence/Abuse

Melody
Carpal \'Tunnel

Reged: 06/02/04
Posts: 10102
Loc: California

If it's a dealbreaker......

08/05/06 06:47 PM

you should be out by now....this is bad thing to remain in. I speak as someone who was in an abusive relationship for 17 years before I got the courage and the good sense to get out. At first it's small.....maybe some insults, a slap, a grab of the wrist....but then it gets worse. I honestly don't know which is worse...the physical or the verbal abuse. At least with the physical, they see the results of their actions and behavior...and sometimes it tempers them a bit. They don't want the neighbors to know...or your family....or people from church/school/work....so your bruises are a reminder that they have to get themselves under control.....HOWEVER....you can't see the emotional bruises....those aren't usually detected by outsiders. Those wounds cut even deeper and do more damage.

Please, please, please....get out while you can....before things become too violent...or before you get so entangled that you end up waiting to leave. I was stupid to let it get so far....but an emotional abuser will cut you off from family and the outside world...making it seem that you have no where to go. You almost think your world is normal. I know that I was in a fog for about 7 years....I thought everyone's marriage sucked like this....then I had an epiphany which woke me up....and dragged me out of the fog. I had to get out. I had to be a sane person.

YOU ARE NOT OVERREACTING!!! Listen to your intuition...and to your good friend. Take any help that is offered to you. Be quiet about your intentions. Take care of banking first. Make sure that you have all of your money secured and any joint accounts are closed. Protect any valuables by getting them somewhere safe while you are transitioning out. Then leave.

Post Extras

Entire topic
Subject	Posted by	Posted on
Overreacting?	confused13	07/02/06 12:00 PM
If it's a dealbreaker......	Melody	08/05/06 06:47 PM
Re: Overreacting?	comfyblanket	07/31/06 08:56 AM
Re: Overreacting?	needy	07/03/06 10:23 AM
Re: Overreacting?	confused13	07/03/06 06:24 PM
Re: Overreacting?	worriedmom	09/07/06 10:44 AM
Re: Overreacting?	911stlmo	07/13/06 02:03 AM
Re: Overreacting?	Renee	07/04/06 11:39 AM
Re: Overreacting?	Spring	07/03/06 07:33 PM
Yeah, I'm sure my ex loved me too...	almostheaven	07/03/06 08:58 PM
Re: Yeah, I'm sure my ex loved me too...	Spring	07/03/06 10:59 PM
Re: Overreacting?	Spring	07/02/06 10:06 PM
I don't know why you're asking frankly...	almostheaven	07/02/06 04:31 PM
You are not overreacting	Renee	07/02/06 12:49 PM
Re: You are not overreacting	confused13	07/02/06 01:20 PM
Re: You are not overreacting	Gecko	07/02/06 01:35 PM
Re: Overreacting?	Gecko	07/02/06 12:39 PM
Re: Overreacting?	hippie1981	07/02/06 12:24 PM

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