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Renee
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Reged: 06/02/05
Posts: 4022
Loc: The Palmetto State
Well, WTH.... vent
      12/14/06 09:47 PM

I just wanted to post a 'can anyone explain this to me' vent....

I spend almost 2 yrs with a man. He moves himself and his kids into my childless house. We get engaged. The three of them are slobs, and our dating / sex life wittles down to non-existent while still under the same roof. My financial situation goes in the dumper because I keep helping him out while he blows $$ on BMX, my stress level goes thru the roof dealing with the drama of an out of control child that dad refused to acknowledge WAS out of control. I get tired of being nothing more than the roommate, wallet and maid, while getting disrespected for my efforts by a kid who is just mouthy enough to me that dad doesn't hear him, and I tell dad they need to move.

Okay, so thats been about two months ago. Life is quiet and I'm getting some sleep and my bp has gone down. Then >poof<

xSO emails and tells me he misses me, wants to go out on a date. I go, we have a great time. He tells me how he's realized the oldest son is out of control and how he's cracking down. We talk here and there over the last few days, not every day, but he's been calling me just to chat. He's paid the bills he said he'd pay. Today he emails me and again tells me he 'really' misses me.

This from a man who shortly before I told him to move answers the question "how do you feel about me" with a long silent pause and then a throw away 'well of course I care about you...'. hmm... okay. He then tells me I'm too needy. Somehow I can't see that - I'm pretty content with just a little attn now and then. I'd like a hug once in awhile, maybe sex more than 1x every few months, and that we go out on a date with just the TWO of us once in awhile. He responds with he's too busy with the kids and too tired otherwise.

Now, suddenly he's being the guy I fell in love with. The one who was affectionate, sexual, and who didn't leave the house without giving me a kiss and a "I love you". WTH?!?!?

Even worse, why the HELL does it put such a smile on my face?!?!

I know better than to trust him with my heart at this point, but I just don't understand - why could he not put in this effort when we were together? He just likes the chase? He's thinking he has the best of both worlds? (freedom in his own place and me on a hook)

^&$%#@@#($! Some guy out there Please give me insight -- what is this male thinking???

Its ironic because I always hear men complain that women let themselves go, and don't want sex and get too wrapped up in the kids. This situation is proof positive in my mind that guys can do that too. I guess I just need to figure out if I can do the casual relationship thing with him, and I'm really not sure I can.

ah well -- sorry for the rant, but i do feel better now. :D

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Entire topic
Subject Posted by Posted on
* Well, WTH.... vent Renee 12/14/06 09:47 PM
. * * Re: Well, WTH.... vent 1004SRS   12/18/06 08:55 AM
. * * Re: Well, WTH.... vent Buckeye   12/15/06 12:12 PM
. * * Re: Well, WTH.... vent Melanie1   12/15/06 10:27 AM
. * * Re: Well, WTH.... vent Renee   12/15/06 07:04 PM
. * * Re: Well, WTH.... vent rocketgirl   12/15/06 12:58 PM
. * * Re: Well, WTH.... vent Melanie1   12/15/06 06:47 PM
. * * Re: Well, WTH.... vent Debbie_L   12/15/06 12:06 PM
. * * Re: Well, WTH.... vent rocketgirl   12/14/06 10:05 PM
. * * Re: Well, WTH.... vent matilda   12/14/06 11:05 PM
. * * Re: Well, WTH.... vent foge33   12/15/06 09:07 AM
. * * Re: Well, WTH.... vent thisaintBB   12/15/06 09:17 AM
. * * Re: Well, WTH.... vent Redlegg   12/14/06 10:20 PM

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