2tadpoles
recently joined
Reged: 06/22/07
Posts: 9
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Re: Navy Legal
06/27/07 11:11 PM
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Sorry, Michelle. BTDT. The cheating, the "I love you, but" line, the whole nine yards.
Despite my emotional pain, the first thing I did (because I was a stay-at-home-mom at the time) was draw up a document stating basically that "I, (insert military member's name), will continue to provide housing and groceries for my family, as well as pay for all existing bills until (wife's name) is self-supporting, at which time an acceptable support agreement will be drawn up."
I demanded that he have it signed and notarized, which made him mad, but seeing as he was screwing a woman he worked with, and I'm bold enough to go to his Commander about it if need be, he complied quickly. Honestly, adultery/fraternization charges rarely make big news, and rarely anymore do they really damage a servicemember's career unless it's a bigwig dating an E-3 or something. Mostly, it would just be a public embarrasment, which my ex doesn't deal with well.
I filed for divorce, but it was because of "irreconcilable differences." I didn't push adultery in the courts. I had no proof, anyway...no pictures, nothing but common sense and word-of-mouth. Navy Legal didn't help me with much of anything except to give me names of lawyers in the area who were familiar with military divorces.
I'm sorry, but I don't agree with the sentiment about adultery making a person a bad spouse but not a bad parent. My children were certainly emotionally harmed by our divorce, and they were harmed by their dad pushing his new girlfriend in their faces before we were even out of military housing. I also think that blatantly disrespecting the child's other parent is emotionally harmful, and adultery involves that. A cheating parent is a poor role model for kids.
Good luck to you.
Edited by 2tadpoles (06/27/07 11:15 PM)
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