Debi
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/03/05
Posts: 7136
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Re: Close encounter...of the opposite sex kind
08/13/07 10:57 AM
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"The consensus of the panel on why so many of us are desperate to find romance is that we are afraid to be alone."
It's funny you said that. I've found that when a person says they aren't dating or looking people assume they have become bitter about the whole situation. As a lot of people here know my x SO has been contacting me a lot lately. For some reason he seems to think that since we broke up (less than 2 years ago) I've had this obscenely active dating and sex life.(maybe he's just hoping that one of us is since he got married and it sounds as if his sex life is about nil) Okay the truth is I dated 3 people and then ended up pregnant. I had planned to marry that person, we had talked about it, looked at rings, the whole deal. I guess a baby wasn't in his plans. Well, it wasn't in MINE either to be honest. Any way I'm babbling. My point is I can tell anyone who wants to know when the last time I had sex was (32 weeks yesterday) I know this for obvious reasons. For the same reasons I'm not interested in meeting anyone right now. I mean come on, it's hard enough to find someone when you're at your best so why in God's name would anyone be interested in me at this point? It could be hormones or just plain common sense but I really don't see a need to look for anyone after I have the baby either. I'm almost 40, men my age are not going to want to date someone with a newborn. I can live with that and I'm okay with it. For some reason my x SO keeps telling me "I can't give up". I haven't "given up" I've come to the realization that I do not and will not have the energy, time or patience needed to cultivate a relationship. I don't think that makes me bitter. It makes me realistic. That doesn't mean that I "want" to be alone forever. It just means that it's not a priority anymore. If it happens, it happens. One of my biggest fears since my divorce has been growing old alone. Since I will have a child who won't graduate from high school until I'm 57 I no longer see that as a problem. It's just not the kind of not being alone that I had pictured!
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When we were together, you said you'd die for me. Now, I think it's time you kept your promise.
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