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Rebecca5
Carpal \'Tunnel

Reged: 06/02/05
Posts: 11697
Loc: Down home.

Re: Trying to help the g/f

08/28/05 10:26 AM

Let me start by saying....there's no such thing as a "lil abusive."

Secondly....you've only known this girl 6 weeks. Why not slow down just a lil bit? Her kids are probably in the midst of some upheaval, her stbx is apparently an abusive control freak and she's still married. This is not a good recipe for a long, loving relationship.

Women who have been victims of domestic violence typically require some serious counseling to get past their issues of dependency, mistrust, and low self-worth. It's a hard place to move past and doesn't just happen overnight. Love and support are some of the best things to give, but they are likely not enough. If she feels like her mother sold her down the river, there are probably also some issues there.

As for the divorce, AlmostHeaven is right. If she has had custody of the children since the separation, it would be difficult for him to change the status quo...especially if she has any proof of the abuse. It's a good idea, until the divorce is final, for you two to live apart. Even then, there may be a "no cohabitation" rule in the divorce papers. I think (but I'm not sure) that SC is one of the states that frowns upon cohabitation when there are children involved.

One of the best things you can do is research the law.

http://www.divorcenet.com/states/south_carolina/south_carolina_grounds_for_divorce

http://www.state.sc.us/dss/csed/index.html

Post Extras

Entire topic
Subject	Posted by	Posted on
Trying to help the g/f	treerla	08/28/05 08:39 AM
I've got to say.....	Melody	09/04/05 12:53 PM
Re: I've got to say.....	sandflea	09/08/05 02:46 PM
I would not advocate...	almostheaven	09/09/05 10:35 AM
Re: I would not advocate...	sandflea	09/10/05 08:20 AM
Re: Trying to help the g/f	passem	08/28/05 08:19 PM
Re: Trying to help the g/f	treerla	08/31/05 08:58 PM
Re: OH YES, RUN LIKE HELL	alabama	08/28/05 03:49 PM
Re: Trying to help the g/f	Miranda	08/28/05 10:37 AM
Re: IF I WERE TO SAY	alabama	08/28/05 01:07 PM
I wouldn't say get away from her.	Dee78	08/28/05 03:19 PM
Re: Trying to help the g/f	Rebecca5	08/28/05 10:26 AM
Re: Trying to help the g/f	almostheaven	08/28/05 09:41 AM
Re: Trying to help the g/f	MikeBlass	09/12/05 05:35 PM
Re: Trying to help the g/f	treerla	08/28/05 10:10 AM

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