SteelersJR1
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Reged: 10/03/05
Posts: 693
Loc: PA
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Re: Even though.............
10/23/05 02:47 PM
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Kim,
After I replied this morning, I went to church. It's the church "we" used to go to. It's about the 6th time I've been there since the separation. Today was no different than the other 5-I cried just listening to the music. The pastor, who knows my issues, seemed to be looking directly at me when he said "Give your troubles to God. Let Him help you through whatever is is you're dealing with". More tears. We greet each other; 2 people we were close to as a couple hugged me. "Keep your chin up". "Hang in there". So now this afternoon is a bust. I've been on a high since yesterday I saw my son for the first time in almost 2 months. That was wonderful, but when I dropped him off, I couldn't help thinking about us as a family. Then, today, the last hymn we sung in church was titled "Sinner, Come Home", so I'm trying not to let it loose, but thinking about my family "coming home". There are some things that will never allow me to not think about this, smells, sounds, places, etc.
I'd like to just get frozen cyrogenically & wake up about a year or 18 months from now & have all this sadness & heartache be over.
Geoff
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Being defeated is only a temporary condition. Giving up is what makes it permanent.
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