Divorce Source: An open letter to katie...

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Divorce Source Community Forums >> Stepfamily Issues

Sherron
Carpal \'Tunnel

Reged: 11/25/06
Posts: 20056

Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..

06/16/08 11:02 AM

In response to pm in an earlier thread about my "qualifications" to judge whether or not adoption is the easy way out...yes, pm, I have placed a child for adoption, and not for any altruistic reasons. *I* was not prepared to raise a child, so I placed the child with another family. The noble thing for me would have been to get my $hit together and grow up, so I could raise the child. I wasn't ready to do that, nor was I interested in doing that, so I made the choice to place the child. Yes, as an end result, the child is better off than he would have been had I raised him, because I wasn't grown up enough to do so at the time. My primary motivator, however, wasn't the child, but me. I have no haunting thoughts, no sleepness nights, and frankly, I am at perfect peace with the decision to the point that this child hardly enters my mind. Now, I could spin it and say I "did it for the child", since the child did benefit, possibly even more so than me, but honestly, I did it for me. I don't consider it "abondonment", because I did choose a couple who I felt was very capably caring for the child, but easy way out... yup, I did take that. You don't have to agree with me, nor do I anticipate that you will, but then again, I don't agree with you that you did it SOLELY for the best interest of the child. IMHO, anyone who has placed a child for adoption and claims they've only considered "the best interest of the child" and not their own, is self-delusional.

Post Extras

Entire topic
Subject	Posted by	Posted on
An open letter to katie...	gr8Dad	06/15/08 10:44 PM
Not choosing any sides here....	Laineann	06/16/08 08:07 PM
Re: An open letter to katie...	PrincessJ	06/16/08 09:12 AM
Re: An open letter to katie...	Tweeby	06/16/08 09:21 AM
Re: An open letter to katie...	PrincessJ	06/16/08 09:23 AM
Re: An open letter to katie...	Tweeby	06/16/08 09:34 AM
Re: An open letter to katie...	PrincessJ	06/16/08 09:35 AM
Re: An open letter to katie...	Avaya	06/16/08 09:31 AM
Re: An open letter to katie...	Relayer	06/16/08 09:38 AM
Re: An open letter to katie...	PrincessJ	06/16/08 10:30 AM
Re: An open letter to katie...	Tweeby	06/16/08 09:43 AM
Re: An open letter to katie...	PrincessJ	06/16/08 10:14 AM
Re: An open letter to katie...	PrincessJ	06/16/08 09:34 AM
Re: An open letter to katie...	Avaya	06/16/08 09:35 AM
Re: An open letter to katie...	PrincessJ	06/16/08 10:13 AM
Re: An open letter to katie...	Rebecca5	06/15/08 11:25 PM
Re: An open letter to katie...	googledad	06/15/08 11:29 PM
Re: An open letter to katie...	Rebecca5	06/15/08 11:32 PM
My dad is adopted...	greeneyes	06/15/08 11:32 PM
Re: An open letter to katie...	Loretta	06/15/08 11:27 PM
Drama, drama, drama...	Miranda	06/15/08 11:01 PM
Because...	gr8Dad	06/15/08 11:06 PM
Re: Because...	katiefedup	06/15/08 11:50 PM
Nice try...	gr8Dad	06/15/08 11:55 PM
Re: Nice try...	katiefedup	06/16/08 12:11 AM
Re: Nice try...	preemiemom	06/16/08 12:01 AM
Re: Because...	katiefedup	06/15/08 11:46 PM
Re: Because...	Loretta	06/16/08 12:03 AM
Re: Because...	katiefedup	06/16/08 12:14 AM
Re: Because...	Loretta	06/16/08 12:20 AM
Re: Drama, drama, drama...	preemiemom	06/15/08 11:04 PM
Please explain this...	greeneyes	06/15/08 10:59 PM
i am talking about a young guy...	gr8Dad	06/15/08 11:03 PM
Apples and oranges...	greeneyes	06/15/08 11:06 PM
Re: Apples and oranges...	Avaya	06/16/08 08:40 AM
How is this so not always true?...	greeneyes	06/16/08 12:52 PM
Re: Apples and oranges...	Relayer	06/16/08 09:35 AM
I believe open adoptions are more common..	greeneyes	06/16/08 12:57 PM
Re: Apples and oranges...	preemiemom	06/16/08 09:52 AM
Re: Apples and oranges...	Avaya	06/16/08 10:17 AM
Re: Apples and oranges...	preemiemom	06/16/08 10:32 AM
Re: Apples and oranges...	spinnerdegrassi	06/16/08 08:51 AM
Spinnner.. Your situation..	preemiemom	06/16/08 09:56 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	spinnerdegrassi	06/16/08 10:20 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	preemiemom	06/16/08 10:30 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	onerose	06/16/08 10:28 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	PrincessJ	06/16/08 10:31 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	preemiemom	06/16/08 10:34 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	PrincessJ	06/16/08 10:37 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Redlegg	06/16/08 10:56 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	spinnerdegrassi	06/16/08 10:58 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	preemiemom	06/16/08 11:03 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Sherron	06/16/08 10:45 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Sherron	06/16/08 11:02 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	onerose	06/16/08 11:04 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	preemiemom	06/16/08 10:42 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	1966Gal	06/16/08 10:45 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	meganb	06/16/08 11:06 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	1966Gal	06/16/08 11:09 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	meganb	06/16/08 11:16 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	1966Gal	06/16/08 11:44 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	meganb	06/16/08 11:46 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	preemiemom	06/16/08 11:52 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	matart1	06/16/08 12:01 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Relayer	06/16/08 12:00 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	meganb	06/16/08 12:04 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	matart1	06/16/08 12:06 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	preemiemom	06/16/08 12:14 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	matart1	06/16/08 12:23 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	preemiemom	06/16/08 12:25 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Sherron	06/16/08 12:37 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	1966Gal	06/16/08 12:45 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Relayer	06/16/08 12:49 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	1966Gal	06/16/08 01:00 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Rebecca5	06/16/08 01:06 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	ssmom79	06/16/08 04:00 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	javajunkiee	06/16/08 05:23 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	matart1	06/16/08 04:26 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	katiefedup	06/16/08 04:15 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	PrincessJ	06/16/08 04:25 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	katiefedup	06/16/08 04:29 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Sherron	06/16/08 04:34 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	PrincessJ	06/16/08 04:37 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	PrincessJ	06/16/08 04:31 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Redlegg	06/16/08 04:34 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	PrincessJ	06/16/08 04:34 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Sherron	06/16/08 04:29 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	PrincessJ	06/16/08 04:48 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	preemiemom	06/16/08 04:51 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	PrincessJ	06/16/08 04:51 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	preemiemom	06/16/08 04:56 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Rebecca5	06/16/08 04:34 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	PrincessJ	06/16/08 04:38 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	preemiemom	06/16/08 04:26 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Rebecca5	06/16/08 04:06 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Sherron	06/16/08 04:03 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	katiefedup	06/16/08 12:58 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	preemiemom	06/16/08 12:55 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Relayer	06/16/08 01:39 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	preemiemom	06/16/08 01:40 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Sherron	06/16/08 01:44 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Relayer	06/16/08 01:43 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	preemiemom	06/16/08 01:59 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Tweeby	06/16/08 01:00 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	matart1	06/16/08 12:27 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	preemiemom	06/16/08 12:28 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Runswithscissors	06/16/08 02:46 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Tweeby	06/16/08 12:31 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Redlegg	06/16/08 12:48 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Tweeby	06/16/08 12:56 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	PrincessJ	06/16/08 01:36 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Redlegg	06/16/08 01:35 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	onerose	06/16/08 12:50 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	preemiemom	06/16/08 12:36 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Tweeby	06/16/08 12:21 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	preemiemom	06/16/08 12:02 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Relayer	06/16/08 12:36 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	1966Gal	06/16/08 12:42 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Tweeby	06/16/08 12:46 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Relayer	06/16/08 12:43 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	RJ1	06/16/08 01:26 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Redlegg	06/16/08 01:43 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Rebecca5	06/16/08 01:42 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Relayer	06/16/08 02:39 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	RJ1	06/16/08 02:12 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Relayer	06/16/08 02:40 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Redlegg	06/16/08 02:34 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	preemiemom	06/16/08 12:49 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Relayer	06/16/08 12:50 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	meganb	06/16/08 11:59 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	meganb	06/16/08 11:55 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	1966Gal	06/16/08 12:01 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	meganb	06/16/08 12:06 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	1966Gal	06/16/08 12:15 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Runswithscissors	06/16/08 02:45 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	PrincessJ	06/16/08 03:21 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Runswithscissors	06/16/08 07:58 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	PrincessJ	06/17/08 08:31 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Rebecca5	06/16/08 03:18 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Runswithscissors	06/16/08 07:58 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	PrincessJ	06/16/08 03:22 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Rebecca5	06/16/08 03:29 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	PrincessJ	06/16/08 03:36 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	preemiemom	06/16/08 03:39 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	PrincessJ	06/16/08 03:42 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Runswithscissors	06/16/08 08:00 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	PrincessJ	06/17/08 08:32 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	preemiemom	06/16/08 02:47 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Runswithscissors	06/16/08 02:52 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	matart1	06/16/08 12:19 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Sherron	06/16/08 12:22 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	preemiemom	06/16/08 12:00 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	meganb	06/16/08 12:02 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	1966Gal	06/16/08 12:10 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Tweeby	06/16/08 12:18 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	1966Gal	06/16/08 12:23 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Tweeby	06/16/08 12:28 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	preemiemom	06/16/08 12:06 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	meganb	06/16/08 12:09 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Sherron	06/16/08 11:15 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Runswithscissors	06/16/08 02:44 PM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	meganb	06/16/08 11:17 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	meganb	06/16/08 11:10 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	1966Gal	06/16/08 11:41 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	Avaya	06/16/08 11:44 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	meganb	06/16/08 11:44 AM
Re: Spinnner.. Your situation..	1966Gal	06/16/08 10:47 AM
Re: Apples and oranges...	lovinmykids	06/16/08 12:06 AM
Did I say women don't abandon their children?...	greeneyes	06/16/08 12:09 AM
Re: Did I say women don't abandon their children?...	Relayer	06/16/08 06:11 AM
Re: Did I say women don't abandon their children?...	lovinmykids	06/16/08 12:14 AM
Re: i am talking about a young guy...	preemiemom	06/15/08 11:04 PM
Re: Please explain this...	preemiemom	06/15/08 11:02 PM
PM, have you considered...	gr8Dad	06/15/08 11:04 PM
Re: PM, have you considered...	preemiemom	06/15/08 11:10 PM
Re: PM, have you considered...	Runswithscissors	06/16/08 09:09 AM
Re: PM, have you considered...	preemiemom	06/16/08 09:48 AM
Re: PM, have you considered...	Tweeby	06/16/08 09:18 AM
Re: PM, have you considered...	Runswithscissors	06/16/08 02:40 PM
Re: PM, have you considered...	preemiemom	06/16/08 02:44 PM
Re: PM, have you considered...	Runswithscissors	06/16/08 02:51 PM
Re: PM, have you considered...	preemiemom	06/16/08 02:53 PM
Re: PM, have you considered...	Sherron	06/16/08 03:15 PM
Re: PM, have you considered...	preemiemom	06/16/08 03:37 PM
Re: PM, have you considered...	PrincessJ	06/16/08 03:41 PM
Yes... well..	preemiemom	06/16/08 03:47 PM
Re: Yes... well..	PrincessJ	06/16/08 04:05 PM
Re: Yes... well..	preemiemom	06/16/08 04:15 PM
Re: Yes... well..	Sherron	06/16/08 04:26 PM
Re: Yes... well..	preemiemom	06/16/08 04:30 PM
Re: Yes... well..	Runswithscissors	06/16/08 08:05 PM
Re: Yes... well..	preemiemom	06/16/08 08:56 PM
Re: Yes... well..	Runswithscissors	06/16/08 10:56 PM
Re: Yes... well..	PrincessJ	06/17/08 08:34 AM
Re: Yes... well..	Laineann	06/16/08 08:20 PM
Re: Yes... well..	preemiemom	06/16/08 08:51 PM
Re: Yes... well..	Runswithscissors	06/16/08 10:54 PM
Re: Yes... well..	preemiemom	06/17/08 06:27 AM
Re: Yes... well..	PrincessJ	06/17/08 08:54 AM
Re: Yes... well..	preemiemom	06/17/08 09:53 AM
Re: Yes... well..	Redlegg	06/17/08 02:07 PM
Responding in general	ssmom79	06/16/08 08:36 PM
Re: Responding in general	spinnerdegrassi	06/16/08 08:57 PM
Re: Responding in general	katiefedup	06/16/08 08:57 PM
You are a liar, but we all knew that...	gr8Dad	06/16/08 10:24 PM
Re: You are a liar, but we all knew that...	katiefedup	06/16/08 10:47 PM
Okay, TRY reading the posts...	gr8Dad	06/16/08 10:59 PM
Re: Okay, TRY reading the posts...	katiefedup	06/16/08 11:06 PM
Re: Okay, TRY reading the posts...	preemiemom	06/17/08 07:04 AM
When I met my wife to be...	gr8Dad	06/17/08 12:13 AM
Re: When I met my wife to be...	katiefedup	06/17/08 08:19 PM
Re: Yes... well..	Sherron	06/16/08 04:38 PM
Re: Yes... well..	preemiemom	06/16/08 04:50 PM
Re: Yes... well..	Sherron	06/16/08 04:41 PM
Re: Yes... well..	PrincessJ	06/16/08 04:43 PM
Re: Yes... well..	Sherron	06/16/08 04:46 PM
Re: Yes... well..	PrincessJ	06/16/08 04:48 PM
Re: Yes... well..	PrincessJ	06/16/08 04:40 PM
Re: Yes... well..	PrincessJ	06/16/08 04:33 PM
Re: Yes... well..	preemiemom	06/16/08 04:37 PM
Re: Yes... well..	PrincessJ	06/16/08 04:28 PM
Re: Yes... well..	PrincessJ	06/16/08 04:00 PM
Re: Yes... well..	Sherron	06/16/08 03:53 PM
Re: PM, have you considered...	Avaya	06/16/08 09:31 AM
Oh, so...	gr8Dad	06/15/08 11:15 PM
Re: Oh, so...	preemiemom	06/15/08 11:26 PM
Re: An open letter to katie...	Loretta	06/15/08 10:57 PM
For there to be equal rights...	greeneyes	06/15/08 11:09 PM
Re: For there to be equal rights...	Loretta	06/15/08 11:15 PM
Does pro life equate to forced pregnancy?...	greeneyes	06/15/08 11:21 PM
Re: Does pro life equate to forced pregnancy?...	M5M5	06/15/08 11:55 PM
Re: Does pro life equate to forced pregnancy?...	Relayer	06/16/08 06:08 AM
Did I say a woman should not use protection?	greeneyes	06/16/08 12:01 AM
Re: Did I say a woman should not use protection?	preemiemom	06/16/08 12:11 AM
Re: Does pro life equate to forced pregnancy?...	Loretta	06/15/08 11:25 PM
The fact is...	greeneyes	06/15/08 11:29 PM
Re: Does pro life equate to forced pregnancy?...	googledad	06/15/08 11:24 PM
Re: Does pro life equate to forced pregnancy?...	greeneyes	06/15/08 11:26 PM
Re: Does pro life equate to forced pregnancy?...	Loretta	06/15/08 11:37 PM
So it is wrong...	gr8Dad	06/15/08 11:13 PM
Did I say that?...	greeneyes	06/15/08 11:18 PM
Re: Did I say that?...	lovinmykids	06/16/08 12:10 AM
Because forced pregnancy is not law....	greeneyes	06/16/08 12:12 AM
Re: Because forced pregnancy is not law....	lovinmykids	06/16/08 12:16 AM
Re: Because forced pregnancy is not law....	Relayer	06/16/08 06:13 AM
Re: Because forced pregnancy is not law....	preemiemom	06/16/08 06:17 AM
Re: Because forced pregnancy is not law....	Relayer	06/16/08 08:37 AM
Re: Because forced pregnancy is not law....	Redlegg	06/16/08 07:40 AM
Re: Because forced pregnancy is not law....	RJ1	06/16/08 08:33 AM
Re: Because forced pregnancy is not law....	Redlegg	06/16/08 08:40 AM
You said....	greeneyes	06/16/08 12:18 AM
Re: You said....	katiefedup	06/16/08 12:25 AM
Re: You said....	lovinmykids	06/16/08 12:29 AM
Re: You said....	katiefedup	06/16/08 12:45 AM
Re: You said....	lovinmykids	06/16/08 12:54 AM
Re: You said....	googledad	06/16/08 12:26 AM
Re: You said....	Loretta	06/16/08 12:33 AM
Re: You said....	lovinmykids	06/16/08 12:55 AM
Re: You said....	Redlegg	06/16/08 05:16 AM
Re: You said....	googledad	06/16/08 12:24 AM
Re: Did I say that?...	javajunkiee	06/15/08 11:33 PM
Sterilization isn't even "foolproof"	preemiemom	06/15/08 11:40 PM
Re: Sterilization isn't even "foolproof"	javajunkiee	06/15/08 11:43 PM
Re: Sterilization isn't even "foolproof"	preemiemom	06/15/08 11:45 PM
Re: Did I say that?...	greeneyes	06/15/08 11:37 PM

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