Divorce Source: Give an inch, he wants a mile

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Divorce Source Community Forums >> Stepfamily Issues

preemiemom
Carpal \'Tunnel

Reged: 01/17/07
Posts: 19391

Re: Well, I have to say

06/25/08 10:42 PM

[quote]Legally, just like you have done your review...I too can do a review and I will. >shrugs<

--------->> Again, get your facts straight. And people wonder why I repeat them, b/c they're invariably totally mis-stated even though they are QUITE clearly presented.

I did NOT do a "review". My order stays as it did on issuance. $25 per month. No extras, No college.

Our "case" has not been NEAR the court for ANYTHING since it was signed last September.

Per our Stipulation it was to be re-calculated, by mutual agreement, after filing 2007 tax returns. I reminded ex of that, and the paperwork that would be needed to file a modification. He asked for calculations. I made a spreadsheet.

He is unable to afford the amount that such a modification would create, even when calculated at the lowest possible "valid" income level.

He OFFERED, since he is now making over double what the order is based on, to pay a certain amount. IF he is able to . He has already almost bounced once check. I was delayed 4 weeks ago in depositing, I gave him a heads up (first ex holds checks forever.. drives him crazy).. When I did I could tell something was wrong, so I asked if he needed me to hold it. Finally he asked that I do. I just gave him the check back. It would have bounced.

This week? I'm sure he'll ask to skip for a while. He is paying his bankruptcy attorney. Which I have "issues" with in concept, that he created $50K of debt in 6 months and didn't pay a dollar. But he has 4 lawsuits pending and if they garnish his pay, he can't pay child support #1. She will have in court at the first missed payment. I understand why he needs to file the bankruptcy now that he's created the mess.. don't agree with his creating the mess in the first place. He knows that. Can't disagree with me.

Sooooo... we have no new order. We will NOT have a new order. I have let the modification period pass. We have no other conditions for recalculation in our Stipulation. Modifications here, as he and I WELLL know, do NOT just happen. Even if justified.

I will not now.. nor in 6 months.. nor in a year... ask for a modification. He has an amount he has offered to contribute. When/if he can. If he has a problem, he won't pay it. I have no recourse, I know I have no recourse, I am fine that I have no recourse.

The most important thing to me is that our child have a happy, well-adjusted relationship with BOTH her parents. That we are not quibbling over dollars.

He is a loving father who would carve out his own kidney himself if one of them needed it.

I will not now.. nor will I ever... become what his first wife is.

I started down that path last year. I did not like what I saw when I looked years down the road, or when I looked at myself in the mirror. Took awhile to "get there" but what matters is that we are loving parents, who will have each other's back if the need ever arises (homelessness, illness etc). That is our commitment, our "debt" to each other. And it is not "measured" in dollars. It is measured in commitment, loyalty, kindness and caring. THAT best serves our child... our children.

Post Extras

Entire topic
Subject	Posted by	Posted on
Give an inch, he wants a mile	JennyLynn	06/25/08 08:14 AM
CS	Laineann	06/26/08 01:53 PM
Re: CS	preemiemom	06/26/08 02:20 PM
Re: CS	Laineann	06/26/08 02:31 PM
Re: CS	Redlegg	06/26/08 02:36 PM
Re: CS	Laineann	06/26/08 02:53 PM
Re: CS	Redlegg	06/26/08 02:38 PM
Re: CS	preemiemom	06/26/08 02:42 PM
Re: CS	preemiemom	06/26/08 02:36 PM
Re: CS	Laineann	06/26/08 02:51 PM
Re: CS	MaritimeGuy	06/26/08 02:34 PM
Re: CS	Laineann	06/26/08 02:46 PM
Re: CS	MaritimeGuy	06/26/08 03:08 PM
Re: CS	Laineann	06/26/08 03:24 PM
Re: CS	Runswithscissors	06/26/08 03:58 PM
Re: CS	PrincessJ	06/26/08 04:07 PM
Re: CS	Runswithscissors	06/26/08 04:15 PM
Re: CS	PrincessJ	06/26/08 04:16 PM
Re: CS	Runswithscissors	06/26/08 04:19 PM
Re: CS	PrincessJ	06/26/08 04:24 PM
Re: CS	Runswithscissors	06/26/08 09:47 PM
Re: CS	PrincessJ	06/27/08 08:35 AM
Re: CS	Runswithscissors	06/27/08 03:36 PM
Re: CS	PrincessJ	06/27/08 03:53 PM
Re: CS	katiefedup	06/26/08 02:26 PM
Re: CS	preemiemom	06/26/08 02:37 PM
Re: CS	katiefedup	06/26/08 02:03 PM
Re: CS	Laineann	06/26/08 02:04 PM
Re: CS	Laineann	06/26/08 02:06 PM
ignore letter	matart1	06/25/08 01:34 PM
Here's a very simple questoin	preemiemom	06/25/08 01:36 PM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	cincsu	06/25/08 11:39 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	1966Gal	06/25/08 09:38 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	1004SRS	06/25/08 08:59 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	JennyLynn	06/25/08 09:04 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	RJ1	06/25/08 08:47 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	JennyLynn	06/25/08 09:04 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	preemiemom	06/25/08 09:28 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	youngatheart	06/25/08 09:41 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	JennyLynn	06/25/08 09:54 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	MTmom	06/25/08 09:49 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	JennyLynn	06/25/08 09:35 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	preemiemom	06/25/08 09:51 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	youngatheart	06/25/08 10:15 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	PrincessJ	06/25/08 09:55 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	JennyLynn	06/25/08 09:57 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	MaritimeGuy	06/25/08 10:49 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	MaritimeGuy	06/26/08 11:01 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	PrincessJ	06/26/08 11:21 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	MaritimeGuy	06/26/08 11:40 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	JennyLynn	06/25/08 10:52 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	preemiemom	06/25/08 10:55 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	PrincessJ	06/25/08 09:57 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	JennyLynn	06/25/08 09:58 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	JennyLynn	06/25/08 09:55 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	arvm	06/25/08 11:41 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	preemiemom	06/25/08 09:58 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	1966Gal	06/25/08 10:24 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	preemiemom	06/25/08 10:39 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	youngatheart	06/25/08 10:51 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	youngatheart	06/25/08 10:32 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	preemiemom	06/25/08 10:42 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	youngatheart	06/25/08 10:52 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	Cassie23	06/25/08 10:51 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	Cassie23	06/25/08 10:54 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	JennyLynn	06/25/08 10:55 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	youngatheart	06/25/08 10:59 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	JennyLynn	06/25/08 11:01 AM
I could see...	gr8Dad	06/25/08 12:15 PM
Re: I could see...	Cassie23	06/25/08 12:19 PM
Re: I could see...	RJ1	06/25/08 12:31 PM
Re: I could see...	PrincessJ	06/25/08 12:34 PM
Re: I could see...	preemiemom	06/25/08 01:30 PM
Re: I could see...	RJ1	06/25/08 12:46 PM
Re: I could see...	MTmom	06/25/08 12:24 PM
Re: I could see...	youngatheart	06/25/08 12:26 PM
Re: I could see...	Arden	06/25/08 12:39 PM
Re: I could see...	youngatheart	06/25/08 12:49 PM
Re: I could see...	JennyLynn	06/25/08 01:31 PM
Re: I could see...	preemiemom	06/25/08 01:33 PM
Re: I could see...	Runswithscissors	06/25/08 05:33 PM
Re: I could see...	jil_stevens	06/25/08 06:46 PM
Re: I could see...	preemiemom	06/25/08 07:40 PM
Re: I could see...	MaritimeGuy	06/25/08 01:49 PM
Re: I could see...	Redlegg	06/25/08 01:28 PM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	MaritimeGuy	06/25/08 11:03 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	Redlegg	06/25/08 11:41 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	Cassie23	06/25/08 11:03 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	MTmom	06/25/08 10:48 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	preemiemom	06/25/08 10:53 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	PrincessJ	06/25/08 10:55 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	preemiemom	06/25/08 10:58 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	JennyLynn	06/25/08 10:26 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	PrincessJ	06/25/08 10:33 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	PrincessJ	06/25/08 10:03 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	JennyLynn	06/25/08 10:05 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	MTmom	06/25/08 09:35 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	JennyLynn	06/25/08 09:36 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	PrincessJ	06/25/08 08:39 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	Cassie23	06/25/08 08:35 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	JennyLynn	06/25/08 08:38 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	BB1	06/25/08 08:27 AM
Wow....I fully agree with BB1	Melody	06/25/08 11:35 AM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	preemiemom	06/25/08 11:39 AM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	Sherron	06/25/08 01:36 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	preemiemom	06/25/08 01:42 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	youngatheart	06/25/08 01:47 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	1966Gal	06/25/08 01:52 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	JennyLynn	06/25/08 01:55 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	matilda	06/25/08 02:09 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	1966Gal	06/25/08 02:07 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	JennyLynn	06/25/08 02:07 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	youngatheart	06/25/08 02:09 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	JennyLynn	06/25/08 02:11 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	PrincessJ	06/25/08 01:56 PM
JL.....	PrincessJ	06/25/08 01:55 PM
Re: JL.....	JennyLynn	06/25/08 01:56 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	JennyLynn	06/25/08 01:38 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	preemiemom	06/25/08 01:43 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	PrincessJ	06/25/08 12:13 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	matilda	06/25/08 11:55 AM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	preemiemom	06/25/08 12:05 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	matilda	06/25/08 12:11 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	youngatheart	06/25/08 11:47 AM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	preemiemom	06/25/08 12:00 PM
I never heard JennyLynn	Melody	06/25/08 12:22 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	youngatheart	06/25/08 12:18 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	Cassie23	06/25/08 12:25 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	youngatheart	06/25/08 12:33 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	matilda	06/25/08 12:08 PM
Cheaper car payments...	gr8Dad	06/25/08 12:18 PM
Re: Cheaper car payments...	PrincessJ	06/25/08 12:30 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	preemiemom	06/25/08 12:13 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	matilda	06/25/08 12:24 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	preemiemom	06/25/08 01:26 PM
Well, I have to say	Melody	06/25/08 08:27 PM
Re: Well, I have to say	Runswithscissors	06/25/08 09:07 PM
well, she wants us to all become NCP men	Melody	06/25/08 10:51 PM
Re: Well, I have to say	preemiemom	06/25/08 09:23 PM
Re: Well, I have to say	Runswithscissors	06/25/08 09:29 PM
Re: Well, I have to say	preemiemom	06/25/08 09:49 PM
Re: Well, I have to say	PrincessJ	06/26/08 08:47 AM
Re: Well, I have to say	preemiemom	06/26/08 09:14 AM
Re: Well, I have to say	PrincessJ	06/26/08 09:24 AM
Re: Well, I have to say	Runswithscissors	06/26/08 10:54 AM
Re: Well, I have to say	PrincessJ	06/26/08 11:20 AM
Re: Well, I have to say	Runswithscissors	06/26/08 10:56 AM
Re: Well, I have to say	PrincessJ	06/26/08 11:23 AM
Re: Well, I have to say	PrincessJ	06/26/08 11:21 AM
Re: Well, I have to say	Miranda	06/26/08 11:22 AM
Re: Well, I have to say	PrincessJ	06/26/08 11:23 AM
Re: Well, I have to say	preemiemom	06/26/08 11:14 AM
No....	Melody	06/26/08 11:44 AM
Re: Well, I have to say	preemiemom	06/26/08 10:56 AM
Re: Well, I have to say	preemiemom	06/26/08 10:04 AM
Re: Well, I have to say	PrincessJ	06/26/08 10:17 AM
Re: Well, I have to say	preemiemom	06/26/08 10:20 AM
Re: Well, I have to say	Runswithscissors	06/25/08 10:03 PM
Re: Well, I have to say	preemiemom	06/25/08 10:09 PM
Re: Well, I have to say	Runswithscissors	06/25/08 10:36 PM
Re: Well, I have to say	preemiemom	06/25/08 10:45 PM
Re: Well, I have to say	KrazyKat	06/25/08 09:34 PM
Re: Well, I have to say	Runswithscissors	06/25/08 09:41 PM
Re: Well, I have to say	RJ1	06/26/08 11:09 AM
And what the hell is wrong with that?	Melody	06/26/08 11:42 AM
Re: And what the hell is wrong with that?	preemiemom	06/26/08 11:46 AM
So what?	Melody	06/26/08 11:53 AM
Re: So what?	RJ1	06/26/08 12:00 PM
Re: And what the hell is wrong with that?	RJ1	06/26/08 11:47 AM
Re: And what the hell is wrong with that?	elliesmom	06/26/08 12:08 PM
Re: And what the hell is wrong with that?	KrazyKat	06/26/08 12:31 PM
Very well said EM!	preemiemom	06/26/08 12:15 PM
Re: And what the hell is wrong with that?	Melody	06/26/08 12:14 PM
Re: And what the hell is wrong with that?	elliesmom	06/26/08 12:21 PM
See now	Melody	06/26/08 12:47 PM
Re: See now	MaritimeGuy	06/26/08 01:09 PM
Re: See now	Runswithscissors	06/26/08 12:52 PM
Re: And what the hell is wrong with that?	RJ1	06/26/08 12:46 PM
Re: And what the hell is wrong with that?	preemiemom	06/26/08 11:50 AM
Re: And what the hell is wrong with that?	RJ1	06/26/08 11:46 AM
Well, in all honesty	Melody	06/26/08 11:52 AM
Re: Well, in all honesty	RJ1	06/26/08 11:55 AM
Re: Well, I have to say	preemiemom	06/26/08 11:17 AM
Re: Well, I have to say	KrazyKat	06/25/08 09:47 PM
Re: Well, I have to say	Runswithscissors	06/25/08 10:01 PM
Re: Well, I have to say	KrazyKat	06/25/08 10:09 PM
Re: Well, I have to say	Runswithscissors	06/25/08 10:17 PM
Same here	Melody	06/25/08 10:55 PM
Re: Well, I have to say	KrazyKat	06/25/08 10:24 PM
Re: Well, I have to say	Runswithscissors	06/25/08 10:26 PM
Re: Well, I have to say	preemiemom	06/25/08 10:06 PM
Re: Well, I have to say	Runswithscissors	06/25/08 10:14 PM
Re: Well, I have to say	preemiemom	06/25/08 10:42 PM
Re: Well, I have to say	Runswithscissors	06/26/08 07:53 AM
Re: Well, I have to say	preemiemom	06/26/08 09:12 AM
Why do you give off the distinct impression	Melody	06/26/08 11:39 AM
Re: Why do you give off the distinct impression	preemiemom	06/26/08 11:44 AM
Re: Why do you give off the distinct impression	Runswithscissors	06/26/08 11:55 AM
Re: Why do you give off the distinct impression	preemiemom	06/26/08 11:57 AM
Re: Why do you give off the distinct impression	Runswithscissors	06/26/08 12:02 PM
Re: Why do you give off the distinct impression	preemiemom	06/26/08 12:15 PM
Re: Why do you give off the distinct impression	Runswithscissors	06/26/08 12:21 PM
Re: Why do you give off the distinct impression	Runswithscissors	06/26/08 12:19 PM
Oh...I have to be spoken to personally	Melody	06/26/08 11:52 AM
Re: Oh...I have to be spoken to personally	preemiemom	06/26/08 11:55 AM
Re: Well, I have to say	preemiemom	06/25/08 08:51 PM
Then your statement should be qualified	Melody	06/25/08 10:49 PM
Re: Then your statement should be qualified	preemiemom	06/25/08 11:09 PM
I didn't compare it to any other debt	Melody	06/26/08 01:33 AM
Re: Then your statement should be qualified	Maury	06/25/08 11:19 PM
Re: Then your statement should be qualified	preemiemom	06/25/08 11:25 PM
Re: Then your statement should be qualified	Maury	06/25/08 11:28 PM
Re: Then your statement should be qualified	preemiemom	06/25/08 11:35 PM
Re: Then your statement should be qualified	Maury	06/25/08 11:40 PM
Re: Then your statement should be qualified	preemiemom	06/25/08 11:45 PM
Re: Then your statement should be qualified	katiefedup	06/25/08 11:57 PM
Re: Then your statement should be qualified	preemiemom	06/26/08 06:12 AM
Re: Then your statement should be qualified	KrazyKat	06/26/08 06:20 AM
Re: Then your statement should be qualified	JennyLynn	06/26/08 06:26 AM
Re: Then your statement should be qualified	Redlegg	06/26/08 06:42 AM
Re: Then your statement should be qualified	JennyLynn	06/26/08 07:01 AM
Re: Then your statement should be qualified	cincsu	06/26/08 12:32 AM
Re: Then your statement should be qualified	preemiemom	06/25/08 11:03 PM
Nope....	Melody	06/26/08 01:31 AM
Re: Nope....	preemiemom	06/26/08 06:16 AM
Re: Then your statement should be qualified	jil_stevens	06/25/08 11:06 PM
Re: Well, I have to say	KrazyKat	06/25/08 09:01 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	Runswithscissors	06/25/08 05:32 PM
What?	Melody	06/25/08 08:24 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	preemiemom	06/25/08 08:16 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	Runswithscissors	06/25/08 09:06 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	preemiemom	06/25/08 09:22 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	ssmom79	06/25/08 02:24 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	PrincessJ	06/25/08 03:09 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	ssmom79	06/25/08 03:08 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	Sherron	06/25/08 02:35 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	Sherron	06/25/08 02:38 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	RJ1	06/25/08 03:32 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	preemiemom	06/25/08 09:17 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	preemiemom	06/25/08 02:40 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	Cassie23	06/25/08 03:23 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	ssmom79	06/25/08 03:14 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	MaritimeGuy	06/25/08 03:20 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	matilda	06/25/08 03:23 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	matilda	06/25/08 03:17 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	JennyLynn	06/25/08 03:20 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	matilda	06/25/08 03:26 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	JennyLynn	06/25/08 03:33 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	MaritimeGuy	06/25/08 03:22 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	JennyLynn	06/25/08 03:25 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	MaritimeGuy	06/25/08 03:34 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	JennyLynn	06/25/08 03:34 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	RJ1	06/25/08 03:46 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	JennyLynn	06/25/08 03:48 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	RJ1	06/25/08 03:55 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	RJ1	06/25/08 03:59 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	JennyLynn	06/25/08 04:05 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	elliesmom	06/25/08 05:20 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	JennyLynn	06/25/08 03:50 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	matilda	06/25/08 01:46 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	preemiemom	06/25/08 01:55 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	youngatheart	06/25/08 02:00 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	matilda	06/25/08 02:11 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	preemiemom	06/25/08 02:34 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	PrincessJ	06/25/08 02:03 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	Redlegg	06/25/08 02:11 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	PrincessJ	06/25/08 02:12 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	MTmom	06/25/08 02:19 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	JennyLynn	06/25/08 02:20 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	youngatheart	06/25/08 01:34 PM
How about a bicycle?	Melody	06/25/08 12:24 PM
Re: Wow....I fully agree with BB1	MTmom	06/25/08 12:18 PM
Phone, Car, Insurance	Melody	06/25/08 11:44 AM
Re: Give an inch, he wants a mile	JennyLynn	06/25/08 08:37 AM

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