[quote][quote]---So you believe that physical abuse is....rare?
Much more so that peoplem ake it out to be. A woman can beat away but a man cant defend himself
---To be subjected to that, over a swear word, when you were in a hospital bed, is ridiculous. She used that *single* incident as an excuse?
--> Yes and it's documented. I never laid a hand a her.
I'm not saying that you gave her other incidents to base the OP on, but I'm just finding it incredible that a supposedly objective, supposedly evidence oriented system, would keep children from their father over a 4 letter word. Yes, my naivete is showing.
---> thats because in no way, shape of form is it objective
I also know FIRST HAND if you are male, the county domestic abuse force will do little or nothing to help you.
---Which is also ridiculous. I tried and was refused WITH POLICE REPORT IN HAND.
If someone really had the crap beat out of them, it would be the first order of business. And I think OP's for verbal stuff is totally ridiculous and meant to enrich the legal profession
--> Nope and the funny thing is the woman before me was granted one because her husband hadnt shown up at home for 3 days and she was pissed.
As a victim myself, I can tell if it really happened or not.
And the excuse of "I didn't want to put all my dirty laundry etc" out there right away is a BS excuse and DV would be the first order of business.
---Now see, that I strongly disagree with. I do not dispute the fact that there are women (and men) out there, that when other tactics fail, pull out the "poor me, I was abused!" card. However, I also have first hand experience at being abused and to this day I will not bring this up at the beginning of any communication that actually involves the abuse. Illogical? Yes. Why? Because I'm embarassed about it. Even more so, I'm mad as hell at myself for allowing it to occur, and not fighting back and for not leaving the *very*first*second* I had an opportunity. I have spent too many years trying to stuff that experience into a little box in the back of my mind, and just whipping something THAT painful, that horrific, and that personal, out to a stranger, is incomprehensible to me. To me, any poster who freely discusses the abuse while still in the middle of it, and who isn't actively looking for an escape hatch, is questionable. If they are discussing financial concerns also during this, it doesn't automatically scream troll to me, provided there are children involved. I'm willing to give the benefit of the doubt to those posters simply because an abused mother/father who has children has to consider the financial repercussions. If there are no kids, and all they have the energy to worry about are finances rather than saving their own skin, I'm suspicious.
---> woman play victim too much to not mention it out of the gate.
I can tell which are real and which aren't, simply by the tone of the writing. And of course, women NEVER start it or even do it to men.
---And of course, women start it and DO it. Call me crazy, but until both men and women step up and actively work to remove the double standards in our society there will be little change in how the legal system views and treats DV. I may be naive, or over estimating my own emotional or phsyical strength, but I find women who pull the 'weaker woman' crap to avoid the consequences for their actions to be an embarassment.
--> It wont changebecause men dont have the ability to play victim like men do. When a woman can shoot her husband multiple times in the back with no evidence of abuse and spend a couple of months in jail and another couple in a mental facility, they can get away with anything. Men cant turn the tears on like women.
Thanks for responding to my post Relayer. [/quote]