timbuktu
journeyman
Reged: 09/26/09
Posts: 77
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Re: Wife hits 40. Leaves all & goes Heavy Metal
12/13/09 10:16 AM
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My husband of 14 years did something similar. Met a chick on the internet and after messing around with her for a very long time and lying to me about it..he left last January and moved in with her.
She was a real "honey", let me tell ya!! Her and my hubby were into the Swingers Lifestyle and after I did some digging on the internet..I found her MySpace account and everything about her life is posted on there in addition to her having her OWN Swingers Lifestyle account where she had posted, "Single woman looking for any kind of sex..any takers??" and she had posted that she liked having any and all kinds of sex with anyone out there..that her fantasy was to be with a large group of men..be the center of attention...and have them do anything and everything to her..she'd dance for them...do anything they wanted..just to be the center of attention.
What a sicko!!
But that's who he left me for..and I felt soo degraded that I'd tried to be a good wife to him all these years..helped him pick up all his pieces when he was in trouble..paid all the bills while he pretended to look for work, etc...and he leaves me for someone like that!!
Well, when he left in January..I didn't hear a word from him for 6 months, but heard through the grapevine that he'd moved in with her and that in April..they'd moved to California together.
In September...again, I heard through the grapevine that he was back in town..and that he was staying between a friend's house..and his mom's. A few weeks later, I went out to the garage and found a dog out there in a kennel..assuming it was his. Two days later, there's a note on the kennel from him, "Call me if you can" with his cell phone #.
I wasn't going there but a few days later, while out in the yard, he came walking up the driveway. He looked horrible...was wearing some sort of weird get up in clothes...was wearing some kind of "Liberache" chain around his neck...he had these geeky looking glasses on (he told me that he could no longer wear his contacts..supposedly from some virus he caught in his eye while out in California and that it just wouldn't go away..)..and I thought to myself, "OMG..what the heck happened to the good looking guy I married??".
Anyway..to make a long story short...he continued to come over here quite a bit while he was home and we became good friends. He had found a job he loved, had reconnected with old friends and seemed really happy everytime he was here. We spent an afternoon cleaning up the yard together and afterwards he brought steaks over, we cooked out with a few friends and it was wonderful.
From the jerk that left me in January..he was finally being the man I fell in love with as he was buying stuff for the puppies...was giving me money any chance he could (since he told me that he owed me the world for bailing him out all those times..and how truely sorry he was..)
But the thing was..he was still seeing this ugh of a woman and was planning on moving back to California (since he'd again..lost his job due to a 17 man layoff) which gave me nothing to go on but friendship.
I asked if she made him happy and he told me that he didn't know what he wanted anymore..she wanted him to get rid of his dog because she'd since moved into a Victorian house in California that she was renting that didn't allow pets..in addition to running her "Naked Massage Service" out of and she was paying him $350 a week cash to answer her phones and set up appts for her to get the women out on site.
I told him, "Sounds like an underground call girl service to me..." and his reply was, "Yeah..I know..but I need the money..without any work..all I've got is my unemployment."
I gave him a hug and told him how sorry I was and as he was hugging me back he said, "I love you sooo much babe.." and I said, "I love you too..you know that.." but then two weeks later, he told me that he was moving back to California..would probably be there for two years at least..and hopefully he'd find a job out there.
UGH!!
I had no choice after hearing that but to go down and file for divorce. I wasn't gonna wait around anymore as he was living with this woman..she was leading him around by the nose..and I had to somehow learn to move on with my life.
I hated doing it and the whole weekend before..I cried my eyes out. I don't think I've ever cried so much in my life but on Monday morning..I finally went down and filed for Pro Se.
I had tried to contact him all weekend about it because I didn't just wanna throw it at him..but his cell phone wasn't working so early Monday morning..I went down and filed.
Luckily..after I came home from Pro Se..he was standing in the yard playing with his dog. I walked up..he looked at me and said, "How's it going...looks like you've been crying..what's going on??!" and I had to tell him that I filed.
God!! I loved this man for 23 years..was married to him for 15...and now that he'd been so nice to me over these past weeks and really feels badly about what he did and is trying to make up for it..I've gotta tell him that I filed for divorce??
I just came out with it..told him how sorry I was and that I didn't WANT to do it...I just didn't have choices anymore since he was going back to California anyway.
He walked me back out front to his truck and said, "I know hon...I've been a real jerk..and I can't blame you. More than anything I want to make it up to you..and maybe once things are over...we can work something out. We get along better now than we have our entire marriage and maybe..getting this monkey off our backs..we can find a way to work this whole thing out and be together again.."
As his chick comes walking down the driveway!!
I looked at him and said, "I can't believe that you actually brought HER on our property....." and his reply was, "Hon..I thought you started work today..we were just getting a few things out of the garage..we're leaving for California today.."
UN...BELIEVABLE!!
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