I have to make just one small point. And I do so because something you said struck a chord within me. My ex-spouse's new wife seems very happy that I have "accepted" it all. And, of course, you mentioned that your ex-husband's new wife was very gracious. Seriously, how could or should they be?
They have our ex-husbands -- for better, worse, richer or poorer, in sickness and in health. What are they going to do? Throw spaghetti at US? We are the ones left behind, you know -- it would make absolutely no sense that they would not be gracious. I don't give anyone points for that. It is the least I would expect.
I give US points for being the gracious ones, as a matter of fact. I think you and probably many others may disagree with me -- but I still believe that marriage is supposed to be forever -- call me stupid (and many have!!) and call me naive and whatever... but I still believe in the sanctity and the ideals behind marriage. People can love you and leave you and that's okay, I guess. But, for some of us marriage was, indeed, a determined commitment. Maybe that is why I feel a bit differently than a lot of people. Not better or worse, mind you, just differently about it all.
Although I still hold true to my own beliefs, I see that the world at large holds little value to fidelity, honesty, integrity. What the "world" does seem to embrace is the quick fix, the "I'm not happy with you now, so I'm trading you in for a new model." Works in commercials and from what I can see with my own eyes, it works in relationships, too.
I have spent a lifetime trying not to judge anyone. All I'm doing now is trying to figure out what to do with me -- it is in reality the only person I have left. I certainly haven't figured most of anything out and I feel I know less today than I did yesterday and the day before. But, I also believe life is all about learning -- boy, haven't WE learned a lot!!
Thanks for your comments -- and just so you know -- you never, ever should feel less (ala your humorous remark about feeling like a troll) than the wonderful woman you are!
Take care (thanks for listening to my soap box). One day I hope all of this will be such a distant memory that it will seem like it all happened to someone else.