"I am saying that I don't think she should be allowed to profit from the situation MORE because she reacted emotionally rather than logically."
What makes you think I wasn't reacting logically? Sure, it was an emotional time. I had to make quick decisions for my safety. But I made phone calls to the dv agency in VA to get their advice. I talked to military friends who also advised I leave and who gave me blankets, food, and money (I've paid them back). It seems you think I planned to leave as a way to "profit." I can assure you, financial gain was nowhere in my mind. At. All!
"and maybe a few months rent until you can get a new job."
Well, he was not going to give me that. He demanded I either sign his separation agreement, which not only gave me nothing but also said we had split up all marital property, or come back. A job?? You seem to think they are easy to come by these days.
"If she had moved forward with the divorce process then, that's what I think she SHOULD have been entitled to. I would hope the court would have supported that. E7 has a variety of excuses, but basically......she did not make sure this was moving forward for over a year."
Ummm, I'm certain I explained my difficulty with retaining a lawyer. I tried. It did not work. I did not have enough $$ to pay a retainer fee, and the free legal attorney said she would only dissolve the marriage, not go for support. I agreed, then she closed my case b/c it had not moved forward. Now, this is the third time I've explained the attorney problems. I hope it's the last. You say I have a "variety of excuses" and that I did not make sure it moved forward. You have absolutely NO IDEA what steps I took over those months. I have three notebooks filled with notes about calls I made, people I worked with, etc. As I told his attorney when he threatened that if I didn't sign the sep. agreement, they would make me responsible for half of the EXAGGERATED, INFLATED, FLAT-OUT WRONG marital debt he added up. Everyone, including my own attorney later, just believed his figures without checking on them. No way was I going to sign that agreement without legal counsel. He dragged it on by continually insisting I sign it with no counsel.
"I'm a master procrastinator, but I'm thinking if I wanted my marriage to be OVER, I wouldn't let things stall for that amount of time. Well, I might.......if I felt like 'something' might happen to him when deployed and I could get his life insurance and widow's benefits, BUT I think a person who wanted the marriage to be over would be more motivated to end it."
Oh, please. What kind of drama are you imagining here? Are you suggesting (yes, you are) that I had hoped for such an outcome? Save it for a soap opera. As far as I was concerned, the marriage was over. I was safely far enough away from him.
Besides, he filed at the one-year mark, which was the only way to do it for a no-fault divorce. I wanted to file earlier on fault grounds, but I could not get it done with no money.