Start Your Divorce Today - Premium Divorce Online


Divorce Source Community Forums >> Child Custody and Visitation

despedina
addict
*

Reged: 08/14/06
Posts: 698
Loc: Hillsboro, MO
Ex being difficult about extracurriculars
      08/21/11 06:54 PM

My daughter will be a freshman in High School this year, so starting this year she will be in the high school marching band (which is what she's worked toward since starting band in 6th grade). At the end of last year, I discussed with my ex that in Marching Band there are many activities in the evenings and weekends especially in Sept and Oct during football. He said he was okay with this. Halfway through July, I got hold of the tentative Band Schedule for this year, made a copy of it and gave to him. Still he was okay with everything including the band camp from 4-9pm during his last week of summer visitation.
The week before his last week of summer visitation, he said he was just going to "give up his week" because it was too much problem for him to get her to camp. We were very frustrated buy my husband and I adjusted our work schedules to be able to get her there on time. Yesterday, my daughter called her dad to ask to go to a dance next Sat night. I told her to also remind him that there is band practice from 8-noon on Sat that she needs to go to (as is noted on the calendar I gave him). I overheard her talking to her dad saying "dad you knew about this" then she comes out and asks if he can skip picking her up on Friday and just pick her up after practice. Again I was frustrated with this but I told my daughter to tell him I'd look into it and get back to him (I wasn't really sure at that moment our plans for next weekend). Apparently this was not a good enough answer because he demanded to speak to me.
He began by complaining that he works until midnight on Fridays and I would have "way more sleep" than him in order to get her to practice. I relented and told him I would get her there but he would need to pick her up, that I could not do all the driving on HIS time. He agreed. I also told him that I did not think I could do this EVERY time there was a Sat band activity on his weekend (there is an activity every weekend in Sept and Oct except 3). I also reminded him that he's had the schedule for over a month to which he said he didn't even know where it was.
I guess I'm afraid this is going to be an ongoing theme this fall. Each of these band activities is worth 100 pts. The band teacher will work with parents who have good reasons for the kids to miss (we are going out of town one weekend which will be excused) but I know my ex will just not take her and not have any better reason than he's tired. My daughter is starting to feel like her dad does not care also. She was very upset when he gave up his summer week and he's also told her he doesn't know why she's so worried about her band competitions, that his former HS will "hand her band's A$$ to them" anyway (classy).
He also just told her today she could not go to the dance because its "too much driving". He lives 25 min from the school. yes I know there's nothing I can do about that but its just more of the same.
Any tips on how to convince him this is very important to her academically (gradewise) and personally that she get to these band activities? She is really not involved in any other extracurriculars.

Post Extras Print Post   Remind Me!     Notify Moderator


Entire topic
Subject Posted by Posted on
* Ex being difficult about extracurriculars despedina 08/21/11 06:54 PM
. * * Re: Ex being difficult about extracurriculars Debi   08/21/11 11:14 PM
. * * Re: Ex being difficult about extracurriculars ssmom79   08/22/11 09:32 AM
. * * Re: Ex being difficult about extracurriculars despedina   08/22/11 09:00 AM
. * * Re: Ex being difficult about extracurriculars MrsB   08/22/11 09:17 AM
. * * Re: Ex being difficult about extracurriculars youngatheart   08/21/11 07:08 PM
. * * Re: Ex being difficult about extracurriculars despedina   08/21/11 08:56 PM
. * * Re: Ex being difficult about extracurriculars youngatheart   08/21/11 09:24 PM
. * * Re: Ex being difficult about extracurriculars MrsB   08/21/11 09:01 PM
. * * Re: Ex being difficult about extracurriculars despedina   08/21/11 09:06 PM
. * * Re: Ex being difficult about extracurriculars youngatheart   08/21/11 09:27 PM
. * * Re: Ex being difficult about extracurriculars despedina   08/21/11 09:39 PM
. * * Re: Ex being difficult about extracurriculars Goodmom   08/22/11 07:52 PM
. * * Re: Ex being difficult about extracurriculars youngatheart   08/21/11 09:57 PM
. * * Re: Ex being difficult about extracurriculars despedina   08/21/11 09:42 PM
. * * Re: Ex being difficult about extracurriculars MrsB   08/21/11 09:41 PM
. * * Re: Ex being difficult about extracurriculars despedina   08/21/11 09:49 PM
. * * Re: Ex being difficult about extracurriculars MrsB   08/21/11 09:38 PM

Extra information
0 registered and 9 anonymous users are browsing this forum.

Moderator:  dsAdmin 



Forum Permissions
      You cannot start new topics
      You cannot reply to topics
      HTML is disabled
      UBBCode is disabled

Rating:
Thread views: 3882

Rate this thread

Jump to

Contact Us Divorce Source Home

*
UBB.threads™ 6.5.1.1


Resources & Tools
Start Your Divorce Online Start Your Divorce
Several Options to Get Started Today.
Divorce Tools Online Divorce Tools
Keeping it Simple to Get the Job Done.
Divorce Downloads Download Center
Instantly Download Books, Guides & Forms.
Divorce and Custody Books Discount Books
Over 100 of the Best Divorce & Custody Books.
Negotiate Online Negotiate Online
Settle your Divorce and Save.
Custody and Support Tracking Custody Scheduling
Make Sure You Document Everything.

Easily Connect With a Lawyer or Mediator
Have Divorce Professionals from Your Area Contact You!
Enter Your Zip Code: