Goodmom
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 06/17/07
Posts: 2006
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Re: Mom's dilemna
10/30/11 02:47 PM
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[quote]Yeah...because the current default of CP/NCP has just worked out so wonderfully in this country....Thankfully the Judge who presided over my wife's divorce saw the inherently superior placement of a 50/50 situation and as well with a stronger push in that direction, in time we'll see an eradication of a dinosaur mentality when it comes to placement. Then again, with this new genearation of children subjected to limited time with one parent, and their inability to understand how to successfully marry and remain married, we'll be sure to have even more divorces to test this theory on. [/quote]
My parents are divorced. Not having to go with my father half the time worked out real well for me.
A mother from my kids' Dojo has parents who are divorced. She only saw her father on Sundays. She has a great relationship with her father. So far, her marriage has lasted longer than mine.
My cousin, also from a divorced family, only had EOW with her mother. She has been married to her husband for almost 20 years. And this is one marriage that I can say is going to go the distance.
My other cousin, her older brother, well, he ran away when my aunt and uncle split. He did eventually come back. He got married a month before me. And is still married. Which puts him at being married for 14 years.
Now, lets go to my best friends when I was growing up. Their parents are still married. Will be married to each other until the day they die. They didn't physically abuse their kids. They just had 8 of them. None of them have had a relationship that has really lasted that long. They did okay in school, but as adults, they just can't make a relationship work. Why is this? Probably because the parents in their intact family just weren't that involved in raising them when they were kids. Which isn't surprising given how many kids there are.
And then there was the intact family next door to me when I was a kid. Their teen-age son was a pervert who exposed himself to my younger sister (she was around 10 at the time, he was around 16).
We could go on with all kinds of stories, both from intact and broken homes.
What it boils down to is: What can the kids handle and how can the parents be more involved within that limitation?
Thankfully, I live in a state that wouldn't force a custody arrangement on my kids that they couldn't handle.
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