Shirt423
recently joined
Reged: 11/29/11
Posts: 7
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Boyfriend's X dictating custody
11/29/11 07:24 PM
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Long story short, mother withholds visitation of 5 year old daughter with her father because she wants him to be living with them and he doesn't.
They have a custody order in place that was ordered in 2008 (during a brief split) and after that he did live with them until the summer of 2010. After they broke up in 2010 he had the little girl every weekend while she worked until she found out he was seeing me. After that she only allowed him to see her at her house to make sure I wasn't around.
The saddest thing is that because my boyfriend is alcoholic she will easily be seen as the more stable parent. He had a DUI last January and she allowed him to be alone with the little girl at her house right after that because she was in hopes he would move back with her. So this isn't actually about the daughters safety it is all about her.
I would never condone a child being left with an active alcoholic but he is now in recovery and doing well.
My question is about the agreement they made in 2008. She hired an attorney and he stupidly signed the agreement because he couldn't afford to hire someone.
The agreement is so generic and doesn't outline any scheduled visitation. My guess is that even then she did everything to have a hold on him so that he had no choice but to stay with her.
The agreement states:
1. Mother shall have legal and physical custody of daughter.
2. Father shall have physical custody of daughter in supervised visits by agreement of the parties.
3.Mother may terminate Father's supervised visits at any time if she believes father is under the influence of alcohol.
3. The parties may petition the court for modification of custody.
That is pretty much it - so she is pretty much withholding visitation not because she "believes he is under the influence" but because she hates me and really doesn't care at all about the child's needs.
I feel so bad for him right now because he feels like he doesn't have a foot to stand on with having the DUI and having signed that order in 08 even though it was never followed and he lived with the little girl for another 2 years being an extremely involved full time father.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks, sorry it was long I just have no experience with this at all.
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