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Debi
Carpal \'Tunnel
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Reged: 06/03/05
Posts: 7155
Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody
      11/29/11 08:49 PM

"I just hope he will qualify for some sort of legal help/funding because there is no way he can afford an expensive drawn out fight."

That will in part depend on your state. In mine there is not legal aid for family court. Either you pay for an attorney or you go in pro se. As YAH stated the mother is not withholding anything because of the way the CO is worded. He may not like it but he agreed to it, and his first step is to file for a modification which you said he's doing.

The CO is worded so that visitation has to be agreed upon by both parties so if she doesn't agree....no parenting time. All she has to say is that she felt he was under the influence and that is why she terminated the visits. He will counter and say she ended them because he has no interest in her. He is an alcoholic so who do you think they will believe. As for him having to find a different AA group, she is going to say that she became involved because she cared about him and wanted him healthy for their daughter.

Saying that he can't have her supervise because it caused him to relapse isn't going to get him far. He relapsed? He owns it. That is what is wrong with this world. People want to blame others for their weakness. HE is the one who has control over what he does.

For everything you have said she is going to have a very valid counter. Even if he does get help for a family attorney it's not going to be someone cut throat because they aren't getting paid. It's not going to be someone who goes out and finds a ton of witnesses and there won't be a long drawn out case because the attorney isn't going to allow it to happen.

Will he get a better deal than he has now if he files a modification? I'm thinking so. At the very least he will probably get a set schedule and a neutral party to supervise. I would NOT count on that person being you. Not because you're dangerous to the child but because you aren't exactly neutral and there is no way mom (who has legal custody) is going to go for it.

I'm glad to hear he is trying to get his life together, but it sounds like he is still at the very beginning of recovery. I don't think this fight is going to help much.

--------------------
When we were together, you said you'd die for me. Now, I think it's time you kept your promise.

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Entire topic
Subject Posted by Posted on
* Boyfriend's X dictating custody Shirt423 11/29/11 07:24 PM
. * * Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody SRS   11/30/11 08:56 PM
. * * Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody Debi   11/29/11 08:49 PM
. * * Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody Shirt423   11/29/11 09:17 PM
. * * Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody Debi   11/30/11 11:40 AM
. * * Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody Runswithscissors   11/30/11 04:23 PM
. * * Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody gr8Dad   11/30/11 05:17 PM
. * * Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody Debi   11/30/11 07:22 PM
. * * Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody gr8Dad   11/30/11 07:49 PM
. * * Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody Debi   12/01/11 09:17 PM
. * * Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody gr8Dad   12/01/11 10:05 PM
. * * Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody Renny   11/30/11 09:28 PM
. * * Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody SRS   12/01/11 05:15 AM
. * * Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody Renny   11/29/11 10:44 PM
. * * Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody gr8Dad   11/29/11 11:19 PM
. * * Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody youngatheart   11/29/11 08:11 PM
. * * Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody Shirt423   11/29/11 08:20 PM
. * * Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody DedicatedDad   11/29/11 07:28 PM
. * * Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody Renny   11/29/11 07:48 PM
. * * Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody Shirt423   11/29/11 07:54 PM
. * * Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody Renny   11/29/11 08:03 PM
. * * Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody onmyown_36   11/29/11 08:00 PM
. * * Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody Renny   11/29/11 08:08 PM
. * * Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody Shirt423   11/29/11 08:07 PM
. * * Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody Anything4Love   12/27/11 12:34 PM
. * * Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody Shirt423   11/29/11 07:38 PM
. * * Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody Avaya   11/30/11 09:17 AM
. * * Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody gr8Dad   11/30/11 10:00 AM
. * * Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody Renny   11/29/11 07:53 PM
. * * Re: Boyfriend's X dictating custody DedicatedDad   11/29/11 07:47 PM

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