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KiwiGirl
Carpal \'Tunnel
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Reged: 06/09/05
Posts: 6271
Loc: Plains State
Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting
      12/21/11 09:12 AM

At 17-18 the girl does not have the mental capacity to think this through. She is in the throes of passion and dreams and plans and probably a good helping of assistance from her mother and her family and reality TV shows.

If Sadie and her husband AND the boy's parents do not support this marriage because they feel these 2 are too young and impulsive and it will end in a divorce then this is their stand.

I did not support my daughter getting pregnant right out of high school and moving in with the moocher. I knew the writing on the wall screamed "Done in 2 yrs!" and she was.
I helped her out a little financially so she had enough to pay her child's copay but when she told me they were planning on getting married I refused to have a part to play in it. She hinted that her father and stepfather and I were 'supposed' to fund this little Emo Dramafest. The 3 of us were determined not to endorse it in any way because we did not believe that this marriage ...
well put it this way. It would be exhibit A in the High Drama Court for "How to make a mockery of marriage".

Just because your child chooses to do something stupid doesn't mean you HAVE to endorse it or support it or even turn up. I wouldn't. See, the other parents are against this as well not to mention the price tag for this "Say Yes To The Dress/Real Housewives...../My Big Fat Gypsey Wedding" compilation.

IF this marriage lasts the ride, well and good. The reasons for marrying are not very clear but the pricetag is. If this was REALLY the One and Only person for her then the big wedding would not even be considered. She would marry him in front of a judge in her best Sunday dress.

No one is owed Their Day. The high drama is all driven by a consumer society. Have Have Have. I want I want I want.
It makes me sad that being a Princess For a Day and the centre of attention is more important than stepping into your new life as a wife.

Sadie, if your DH is talking to his daughter he should broach the subject of premarital counselling and them saving for their future. He should ask her the hard questions.... they should both have life insurance policies to protect the spouse left behind. What happens if they get pregnant and the child is born with a birth defect? What happens if one of them loses their job? Is she willing to travel across country or to another country if this is what is needed for her husband to keep his job? Is he willing to do the same thing? IS she willing to move away from her friends and family to a town where they know no one because this is the only place with a job? What happens if they get evicted from their apartment? Does she know how to arrange to get the phone connected, power connected? How do they plan to get an excellent credit score? Does she know what her credit score is? All this stuff are things people willing to live their life together need to know. Are they prepared to pay for their own health insurance? Married people do not rely on others to support them including health insurance. I don't even think you can cover a married child on your insurance.

If she is determined to make this momentous step she should be prepared to no longer rely on relatives to prop them up but to stand on their own 2 feet.

It really sounds like the Day is the primary focus and not the next day and the day after that.....

The one good thing si they do not want to get married until after graduating high school. This is some months off yet and they may well drift apart.

This being said, my nephew has had the same girlfriend since he and she were 14. He is now 20 and they are marrying next April. 6 years together. Do they have all the answers? Probably not and neither do I endorse their rather large wedding esp. as they have been living together for the past 2 years. But they have left high school 3 years ago and are both working and saving for a house. They are also funding the majority of their wedding themselves.

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If I can't be part of the solution I insist on being most of the problem

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* Hubby and I had a very interesting Sadie 12/19/11 03:35 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Gecko   12/20/11 02:02 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Miranda   12/20/11 02:10 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Gecko   12/20/11 04:26 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Char9   12/20/11 12:22 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting elliesmom   12/20/11 12:44 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting LexieBelle   12/20/11 12:58 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting javajunkiee   12/20/11 12:40 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting ssmom79   12/19/11 03:39 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Cassie23   12/19/11 04:02 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Char9   12/20/11 09:39 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sadie   12/20/11 05:27 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Loretta   12/21/11 12:30 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting SweetLight   12/20/11 11:45 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sadie   12/21/11 05:25 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting SweetLight   12/21/11 09:52 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting ssmom79   12/21/11 10:03 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting RJ1   12/20/11 07:04 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting ssmom79   12/20/11 10:09 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting LexieBelle   12/20/11 10:06 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting M5M5   12/21/11 07:13 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting LexieBelle   12/21/11 08:04 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting KiwiGirl   12/21/11 09:12 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sadie   12/21/11 10:28 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting ssmom79   12/21/11 10:38 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Cassie23   12/21/11 10:20 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting M5M5   12/21/11 12:46 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Debbie_L   12/21/11 01:24 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting spinnerdegrassi   12/21/11 01:40 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting M5M5   12/21/11 07:04 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Reilly   12/22/11 05:42 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting M5M5   12/22/11 06:47 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting spinnerdegrassi   12/21/11 07:29 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Arden   12/22/11 02:13 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting ssmom79   12/22/11 02:18 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting LexieBelle   12/22/11 02:54 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Arden   12/22/11 02:26 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting ssmom79   12/22/11 02:41 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Arden   12/22/11 03:10 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting ssmom79   12/26/11 04:55 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting M5M5   12/21/11 10:52 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting gr8Dad   12/22/11 07:11 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sherron   12/22/11 08:18 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting gr8Dad   12/22/11 08:58 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sherron   12/22/11 09:03 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting gr8Dad   12/22/11 09:06 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting spinnerdegrassi   12/22/11 09:12 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sherron   12/22/11 09:14 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting gr8Dad   12/22/11 09:25 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sherron   12/22/11 09:29 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting LexieBelle   12/22/11 09:45 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting gr8Dad   12/22/11 10:01 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting LexieBelle   12/22/11 10:26 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sherron   12/22/11 10:04 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting gr8Dad   12/22/11 10:06 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting M5M5   12/22/11 12:13 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting gr8Dad   12/22/11 12:24 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting M5M5   12/22/11 12:41 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sherron   12/22/11 12:58 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting LexieBelle   12/22/11 01:28 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sherron   12/22/11 01:34 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Arden   12/22/11 02:03 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting LexieBelle   12/22/11 01:38 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sherron   12/22/11 01:40 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting LexieBelle   12/22/11 02:48 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting LexieBelle   12/22/11 10:22 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sherron   12/22/11 10:28 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting LexieBelle   12/22/11 10:31 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Loretta   12/22/11 10:35 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sherron   12/22/11 10:36 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting LexieBelle   12/22/11 10:41 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sherron   12/22/11 10:52 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sherron   12/22/11 10:08 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sherron   12/22/11 10:10 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting googledad   12/22/11 10:11 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting googledad   12/22/11 10:12 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sherron   12/22/11 09:57 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting spinnerdegrassi   12/22/11 12:59 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting M5M5   12/22/11 01:23 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting googledad   12/22/11 10:07 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sherron   12/22/11 09:59 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sherron   12/22/11 09:16 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting spinnerdegrassi   12/22/11 09:37 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sherron   12/22/11 09:06 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting LexieBelle   12/22/11 09:44 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting M5M5   12/22/11 12:11 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting LexieBelle   12/22/11 12:36 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting LeAnne   12/22/11 01:02 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting LexieBelle   12/22/11 01:15 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting spinnerdegrassi   12/22/11 01:03 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sherron   12/22/11 01:08 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting LexieBelle   12/22/11 01:17 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting M5M5   12/22/11 01:28 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting LexieBelle   12/22/11 01:35 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting M5M5   12/22/11 02:24 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting LexieBelle   12/22/11 03:27 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sherron   12/22/11 07:05 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sherron   12/22/11 07:08 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting LexieBelle   12/22/11 07:28 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sherron   12/22/11 07:34 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting LexieBelle   12/22/11 08:18 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sherron   12/22/11 09:13 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting LexieBelle   12/23/11 09:32 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting ssmom79   12/26/11 08:00 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting LexieBelle   12/26/11 09:38 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting SRS   12/27/11 07:51 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting LexieBelle   12/27/11 09:54 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting spinnerdegrassi   12/22/11 07:22 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting LexieBelle   12/22/11 09:02 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sadie   12/21/11 08:33 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting M5M5   12/21/11 10:53 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Debbie_L   12/21/11 04:02 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting javajunkiee   12/21/11 10:52 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Cassie23   12/21/11 02:19 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sadie   12/21/11 02:33 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting ssmom79   12/21/11 02:56 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting LexieBelle   12/21/11 02:29 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Miranda   12/21/11 10:38 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Cassie23   12/21/11 01:40 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting spinnerdegrassi   12/21/11 10:41 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting ssmom79   12/21/11 10:40 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Miranda   12/21/11 10:44 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting youngatheart   12/21/11 05:03 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sherron   12/21/11 10:46 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting LexieBelle   12/21/11 10:31 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting gr8Dad   12/21/11 10:35 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting spinnerdegrassi   12/21/11 10:38 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting spinnerdegrassi   12/21/11 10:31 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Miranda   12/21/11 10:40 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting ssmom79   12/21/11 10:41 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sherron   12/21/11 10:33 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting LexieBelle   12/21/11 09:32 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Char9   12/20/11 12:18 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting youngatheart   12/19/11 04:07 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Sadie   12/19/11 04:47 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting Goodmom   12/19/11 08:31 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting ssmom79   12/20/11 07:50 AM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting youngatheart   12/19/11 05:55 PM
. * * Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting annieo   12/19/11 05:30 PM

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