KateL
recently joined
Reged: 02/08/07
Posts: 4
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What do you think
02/08/07 09:34 AM
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Hello. A coworker suggested I check out this website. My husband and I have been working on saving our marriage for about a year now. If you want to call it working. Either he is working on it or I am, but never at the same time. We got a great counselor, although we haven't been in a few weeks do to conflicting work schedules and the counselor is very popular.
My husband had an affair with someone he works with. Although he doesn't work directly with her anymore he still does see her. He has told me that he is committed to me and wants to work on our marriage. But I have continually seen text messages from her on his phone. He says that he isn't being mean to her because he doesn't want her to get him into trouble at work because he is a supervisor and she is not.
I don't know anything about this girl. She is 6 years younger than my husband. I don't know if she is vindictive or obsessed or what the deal is. But I think it is completely unfair of him to expect me just to deal with the fact that she can still call and text him whenever she wants just because he is afraid of getting into trouble at work.
What I really think is going on is that he encourages her to stay interested in him, like a back up plan in case things don't work out for us. I can't understand why if he were to say to her that he is working on his family and getting back together with his wife, we also have a young son, why she would be so ruthless as to keep trying. Does this make sense to anyone. Or do you think my conclusion is the best fitted.
I just don't know when to believe him anymore. It seems like he lies about everything now. Everytime I start to forgive him and move past it she pops up and I am catapulted right back.
He gets so upset when I ask him about why she is still doing this, like its a diversion. He gets all fired up and asks why I can't get over it, when that seems obvious.
Anyone have any ideas on how to approach this? Thanks
Kate.
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