JoeDakota
recently joined
Reged: 10/16/07
Posts: 19
Loc: Southeast, Michigan
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Married to Wife.
11/07/07 10:36 AM
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Married to Wife.
The step-kid is growing up and frankly don't give a damn about step-dad, other than his money. The wife is focused on the welfare of the kid, and even if she weren't, there is no adrenaline rush of a romance after years of doing battle together. She’s an alcoholic. It's just reality.
Why am I doing what I am doing every day? Is it because it makes me happy, or is it because it makes someone else happy?
There does come an age where all of the propaganda about being a husband, father, and provider has to actually be fulfilling, and not just sold as such.
I can remember how exciting all of these things seemed not so long ago - the prospect of raising children, advancing a career, piling up money for the family and retirement, sharing it with a life -long partner
There simply comes a time when you wake up and realize that you are spending the vast majority of your time so that other people can find their identity, nourish their interests, etc. - and you are there to fund it. Whatever else you are is always at risk if you fail to continue the funding.
"For better or worse"....not really....more like, "for as long as you are able to prop up the wants and needs of your spouse and the children", they will pay lip service to what a great 'family man' you are. If and when your presence no longer equates with an upper middle class standard of living, then even the lip service disappears. You are something entirely different to all involved at this point.
What's in it for me? Perhaps that is an unforgivable act of self-pity. I am not going to argue otherwise.
Being a mainstream family man was supposed to be such a rewarding experience and now it's turning out to be something else.
I wake up every day and have to remind myself that I am responsible for my own happiness and fulfillment in life.
~JoeDakota
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