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#279 - 06/17/04 02:48 AM Filling for custody.
Jarenblue Offline
newbie

Registered: 06/17/04
Posts: 25
My husband just had his name added to his 7 year old son's birth certificate and so we were finally able to request school records. They were horrible (excessive absences/tardies, failing grades and not doing homework). We would like to file for custody. There has never been a custody order. Does anyone know if North Carolina has any laws reguarding custody when there is no order? Can we file like it is a new custody order or would it be considered a modification since his mother has had him since birth?

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#280 - 06/17/04 04:32 AM Re: Filling for custody. [Re: Jarenblue]
Spring Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 06/03/04
Posts: 7973
Obviously, a lawyer is who to talk to..but unless you can prove the mom to be unfit, you will have a very tough road ahead of you. Gaining custody from mom after seven yrs is tough. I believe she is presumed to have custody...paperwork or not.

What are the reasons for the poor attendance trecords? How much iinvolvement has your husband had with this child?
_________________________
Never consider the possibility of failure; as long as you persist, you will be successful.

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#281 - 06/17/04 01:06 PM Re: Filling for custody. [Re: Spring]
Jarenblue Offline
newbie

Registered: 06/17/04
Posts: 25
We have seen him every summer/Christmas break since he was 2 years old. We use to live in PA, so it was an 8 hour drive. Since moving to NC, we have taken him every school break that his mom would let us and now we have him for the summer.

It is not only attendance (31 days) that is the issue, the tardies are just as bad (17 days). Apparently, his attendance has been like this since he started school 3 years ago. His mother doesn't make him do homework because she says it is too hard for him and she doesn't go to Parent/Teacher conferences to see what can be done to help him. They have moved 6 times in the last year and she has gone through 4 jobs in 6 months. The mother is now living with a relative, again, and they must all sleep in one room. We already have sole custody of 2 older children from this marriage.

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#282 - 06/17/04 03:54 PM Re: Filling for custody. [Re: Jarenblue]
Tweeby Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 06/05/04
Posts: 7100
My husband is waiting the magristrate decision for the change of custody of his younger son. The reason was educational neglect. Check your state laws and also you need to talk to a lawyer. My SS's attendance was a lot more severe and he had the school principal testify that the BM would NOT co-operate with the school.

What were the reasons that you have custody of the other children and not this one?

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#283 - 06/17/04 04:29 PM Re: Filling for custody. [Re: Tweeby]
Jarenblue Offline
newbie

Registered: 06/17/04
Posts: 25
Their mother originally gave them to my husband in 1997 because she said she couldn't get them the help that they needed. She tried to take them back in 1999 but after she made many bad decisions, the court gave them back to us. We did not seek custody of the child at that time because my husband was not listed on the birth certificate and his ex said he was not the father. My husband's name was added about a month ago and we were able to file for school records. We did not know that he was doing so bad or that he was missing so many days. She would always say he was doing fine. He does not even know all the letters of the alphabet and he will be 8 in July. It was really disturbing.

There is currently no custody order in place for him.

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