Here's what I think you should do. . . go see an attorney. Oh, and find out what your husband really wants.
In KY, a divorce w/children can be over in 30 days, if uncontested.
However, if everything isn't so agreeable, a divorce can go on for months. And, I wouldn't worry about him going somewhere else to file so that he can get it over with in under 10 years. You will get a chance to respond. If you don't agree, the attorneys duke it out.
Stop worrying about the 10 year mark. Your husband sounds like he needs THERAPY and quick. Or, he may in fact be using that as an excuse to get out. You either need to focus on getting help to save your marriage or get rid of this guy.
And, just being married for 10 years, doesn't automatically make you eligible for lifetime almiony. I would think 'lifetime' alimony is quite rare. What if you remarried? How old are you? How educated? How much work experience do you have? What is your health like? Are you disabled?
If you need some type of maintenance after the divorce, you could probably get that without being married for 10 years. I received temporary maintenance for 4 years after our divorce was final and we were only married for 8 years total, 7 years when the maintenance order was made.
Please, if a divorce is going to happen, get a good attorney and fight for what you need to survive. An attorney can let you know, based on your situation, exactly what you will be entitled to.
If a court thinks you are able to support yourself, then take pride in that and do it. And, consider yourself lucky that you aren't with a man that cares more about keeping his dollars than keeping his wife and family.
Once it is all said and done, get yourself some counseling and realize that you are worth MORE than a lifetime of alimony payments from any ex.
Dyslexic agnostics don't believe in Dog.