Custody in the Face of False Abuse Allegations

Often fathers are involved in custody battles where they are falsely accused of child abuse. False accusations against fathers can and sometimes do affect their rights as far as custody is concerned.  It may be confusing to the father why the mother of their child is making such outrageous allegations. There are no perfect answers when it comes to issues of fathers (or mothers) accused of child abuse.  What motivates one parent to make false accusations is one for the therapists and/or courts to sort out.  However, in high conflict divorces or custody matters, the parent who makes the accusations appear to come out with an advantage over the other parent who is accused of these horrible acts.

If you are a father (or mother) falsely accused of child abuse, physical, sexual, or even neglect, it is important to demonstrate to the court that these accusations are false. Gather as much information as you can and provide witnesses showing your relationship with your child; this will ultimately help in a custody matter.

As a parent falsely accused of child abuse, you might just want the allegations to go away, and resume the old custody routine; or you may believe it is better for the child or children to take custody away from the other parent. Judges sometimes look at false accusations and may restrict custody of the parent making the accusations. Sometimes a judge may change custody, or parenting / visiting time to avoid further false accusations.  In any event, make sure that you do not fall into the same routine of talking bad about the other parent.  This will not help in a custody matter.  A judge can order supervised visitation for an accusation of sexual abuse of the child. Actually a judge can order supervised visitation for any abuse allegation.

Parents who are falsely accused of child abuse may want to consider monetary sanctions against the other parent as well as primary custody and even sole legal custody. There is a real good chance the parent making false accusations is attempting to alienate the child or children as well so make sure you talk to your lawyer, or if you don’t have one, now is a good time to get one.

It is beneficial to demonstrate to the court the parent making the false accusations is doing so willfully and without proof of any child abuse or neglect. If the parent can show to the court that the other parent is making false accusations, the court may indeed sanction the parent making the accusations and if the parent is represented, the attorney represent the parent can be sanctioned. If others are involved in making false allegations, i.e., grandparents, other family members, friends, the court can also sanction those individuals.

Making allegations of abuse against the other parent is also child abuse. Mom (or dad) who tries to take away dad’s (or mom’s) time with the child or children only hurt the child or children.  Parent’s don’t realize that if they make false accusations against the other parent, the parent making that accusation is abusing his or her own child. It is up to both Mom and Dad to protect their child. Mom is no more important than Dad when it comes to the love and relationship with the child or children.

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