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3 Tips for Dating After Divorce

It can be tempting to start dating again soon after divorce, especially if you are not used to being alone. But you should follow some guidelines for dating after divorce. Otherwise, you may find yourself not only heartbroken again, but also facing consequences in court.

Do Not Feel You Have to Compete with Your Ex

You might hear your ex is already dating again, which may tempt you to go out and find someone to date, too. However, this can lead to disaster, especially if you are not really ready to date or cannot find someone you really like. In fact, you may end up just wasting your time with someone you do not enjoy being with. A rebound relationship will not help anyone, so try to avoid competing with your ex by dating too soon. You should also keep in mind that your ex may just be either making up the new significant other, or may have jumped into a relationship simply to do it before you, so there is no need to continue this behavior by trying to make it a competition.

Do Not Introduce a New S.O. To Your Kids Too Soon

If you really like someone, or if you feel your children need another parent around, you may be tempted to introduce your new boyfriend or girlfriend to your children right away. But experts advise you to wait a while, even several months, until you are sure it is serious. Your children may already have a tough time dealing with the divorce. Introducing someone new and then having them disappear soon afterward due to a breakup is not a good idea.

Plus, your ex could hear about it and disapprove, persuading him or her to do everything possible to have the children taken out of your care. If he or she can provide evidence that your new significant other could be dangerous for the kids, your custody or visitation rights could be threatened. You can avoid this issue by waiting until the relationship is more serious to introduce your new S.O. to the children.

Take Time for Yourself

What you need right after a divorce is not a new relationship. You need time to heal and get used to not being married anymore. You also need to surround yourself with friends who are supportive since you will need someone to lean on. You might already have someone in mind to start dating, but you are advised to keep him or her as a friend for now. If you are feeling somewhat healed in a few months, you can always try turning your friendship into a relationship.

Dating right after divorce can be complicated for everyone involved. This is why you should take some time to heal while you get your finances in order and take care of the legal factors of divorce. Once you are feeling ready to enter the dating world again, and your divorce is final, you can confidently start looking for someone special.

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Fault grounds for divorce include adultery, constructive abandonment for at least one (1) year, cruel and inhuman treatment, and imprisonment of a spouse for three (3) or more years. Prior to October 2010, other than a legal separation agreement that was filed with the court, divorces were based on fault.
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