New York Info

New York Divorce Start Your Divorce Find Professionals New York Articles Divorce Facts Divorce Grounds Residency Divorce Laws Mediation/Counseling Divorce Process Legal Separation Annulments Property Division Alimony Child Custody Child Support Divorce Forms Process Service Grandparent Rights Forum New York Products Divorce by County

New York Articles

Agreements Custody & Visitation Child Support Counseling Divorce/General Domestic Abuse Financial Planning Foreign Divorce Mediation Parenting Property Division Spousal Support SEE ALL

Info Categories

Contemplating Divorce Children & Divorce Divorce, Dollars & Debt Divorce Laws Divorce Process Divorce Negotiation SEE ALL

More Information

Articles Checklists Research Center Cases of Interest Dictionary Encyclopedia Encyclopedia (pop-up) Blogs

For Professionals

Advertise With Us Free Network Page Join Our Network Submit Articles Sign In

Network Sites

New York Divorce Support New York Divorce Online

4 Common Reactions Among People Who Are Getting Divorced

Not all people who get divorced react the same. There are several acceptable - but not necessarily healthy – ways to respond to divorce. You should get an idea of some of the most common reactions, and decide if you have displayed any of this behavior during divorce.


People in denial think the divorce will never actually happen, even after their spouse tells them they want out of the marriage. They think some counseling or simply some extra TLC will stop the divorce, which is why they do not hire a lawyer or tell anyone what is going on. Meanwhile, their spouse is way ahead of them, having already hired a lawyer and on their way to moving out.

The Victim Mentality

Some people take divorce harder than others, and they end up blaming it all on their spouse. They might cry, scream, and complain to anyone within earshot. While grieving is a normal part of the process, these people are more dramatic than most, and may whine to anyone who will listen, not just their friends and family. Sometimes this attitude seems warranted, such as after domestic violence or infidelity, but it can be hard for others to put up with for long.

Lack of Any Emotion

On the other side of the coin, there are those who accept the divorce a little too quickly. They try to be practical about things, and do not show any emotion throughout the process. Not only does the complete lack of feelings make people uncomfortable, but it can also lead to an unexpected blowup of emotion once the divorce is complete. Such people are not dealing with the divorce while it is going on, and all the feelings are bottled up until they are completely alone. Unless these people have simply seen the divorce coming for years, and therefore had time to come to terms with it, this kind of response is not healthy.

The Smug Attitude

This person is usually the one who initiated the divorce. Once the process is underway, people like this often act like they won a game and have gotten their desired ending. However, even when it seems like everything is going right for them, there are probably some emotions they are not dealing with. If they were, they would likely not be quite so happy since most people feel some amount of pain when ending a long relationship. It is normal to at least reminisce about happier times in your house as you pack your bags, and long for the better times in your marriage.

You probably know a few people with these attitudes, and perhaps you even have one of them. Many of these reactions to divorce are unhealthy, though they are common. If you feel like you have one of these attitudes, you should consider talking to someone about your feelings as you go through divorce. Even talking to friends about your emotions can help you deal with it in a healthy way.

Was this helpful? Like our site & let us know.

Related Articles

Start New York Divorce Start Your New York Online Divorce Today
Easy, Fast and Affordable with a 100% Guarantee.
New York Divorce Find New York Divorce Professionals in Your Area:
Join the Network
New York Divorce Products, Services and Solutions New York Divorce Products, Services and Solutions
New York Divorce Resources to Help You Through the Process.
Online Parenting Class New York Mandatory Online Parenting Class
Easy and convenient - complete at your own pace online.
Divorce and Custody Books Discount Divorce Bookstore
Over 100 Titles of the Best Books on Divorce & Custody.
Divorce Downloads Divorce Download Center
Instantly Download, Books, Manuals, & Forms.
Divorce Worksheet Free New York Divorce Worksheet & Separation Agreement
Your Guide to Get Organized and Put Everything in Writing.
Fault grounds for divorce include adultery, constructive abandonment for at least one (1) year, cruel and inhuman treatment, and imprisonment of a spouse for three (3) or more years. Prior to October 2010, other than a legal separation agreement that was filed with the court, divorces were based on fault.
Divorce Lawyers & Mediators

Find Professionals

Easily Connect With a Lawyer or Mediator
Have Divorce Professionals from Your Area Contact You!
Enter Your Zip Code:


Start Your Divorce File for a New York Divorce


Settle Your Divorce Negotiate Your New York Divorce


Support Forum New York Support Forum

Guarantee Official PayPal Seal Facebook Twitter Versign Secure Site