While Divorcing Your Child Should Not Be Your Ally
Trying to get your child to be on your side is a common trap that parents tend to fall into. Parents see it as though they are showing more love or attention by doing so, but rather it is often a selfish tactic to gain revenge against the other parent.
We realize that all situations are unique and certainly some parents are capable of out doing themselves when it comes to being arrogant, inconsiderate, disparaging, neglectful, etc., but it is recommended, no matter how bad the situation may be, that every parent refrain from using a child as an ally or teammate against the other parent. If your child is of an age to be on your side, then he or she is old enough to make his or her own decisions. Do not influence or force your child to take your side.
The common mistakes that are made by parents:
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SEPARATE FEELINGS FROM BEHAVIOR – Successful co-parents focus on the child -- and only the child. Any anger, resentment, or hurt takes a back seat to the child's needs. Co-parenting is not about the adults’ feelings but rather about the child’s happiness, stability, and future.
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