Coping Skills for Going Through Divorce
Quote: A strong positive mental attitude will create more miracles than any wonder drug. (Patricia Neal)
Personal Well-being Through the Divorce Process:
Developing your self-esteem is an important step in living through separation and divorce. You should focus on your personal strengths and not be distracted by situations that decrease your confidence.
Confidence does not come automatically. It requires a repetition of well-done tasks. Just as a series of failures can destroy your confidence, a series of small successes will build it. Do not view your divorce as a failure, view it as a learning experience. One success leads to another, and the positive effect on your self-image is cumulative and unique to you. Embrace your uniqueness and build your self-confidence with each of these steps:
Typically, one spouse seems to become trapped by perpetuating their low self-esteem. The result is that they are treated the way they allow themselves to be treated, based on how they feel about themselves.
A healthy dose of assertiveness will cure that syndrome. Assertiveness is not aggressiveness. Assertiveness means standing on your own two feet and being your own best advocate. Assertiveness contributes to optimum mental health.
A so-called "wimp" gets into a cycle of low esteem (non assertiveness = low esteem). The following definitions may help you understand this self-cycle better:
See the difference? Which shoe fits you? If you are not assertive, take these 10 steps toward sharpening and maintaining your mental fitness:
Resources & Tools
REWARD OF EXPERIENCE -- The ancient Greeks believed that the reward of suffering is experience, yet experience can make a person its victim. Divorce recovery, in the end, means acceptance and the ability to go forward. The ability to keep a perspective, a sense of humor (even a dark one) helps, but in the end people recover by putting one foot in front of the other and living.
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