Need advice and help on this matter ASAP please

Posted by: shyone

Need advice and help on this matter ASAP please - 11/29/11 10:47 AM

I was taken into custody for a misdeamnor probation violation (got violated) and was asked by the probation officer if she should call social services or their father. We went thru a bitter divorce (took 17 months to complete). I told the probation officer to contact their father as it was agreed when he took me to court this year to get placement that if I was taken into custody that they would go to him so I upheld that promise. I was in jail for a month with no word from him as to what he was doing with our kids. We went to mediation and agreed to change his visitation schedule, but I had refused to allow him to have placement. I know that I did was wrong to be violated on probation and deserved to be in jail because of that, but he took it upon himself to put them in a different school (we live about 40 minutes apart) and enroll them in programs that are very constructive in their young lives (both of them are under 10 years old). I know that the mediation agreement states that joint custody is to discuss between one another of the schooling, etc. for the children. I understand that it was a burden for him to travel back and forth to take them to the school that they had been attending for almost three school years. I realized that my actions for what I had put them thru was not the best, but I am improving my life now since getting out of jail and will be taking more responsibility for my actions not harm my children no more and not have them go thru what I had them endure. I was never sentenced for anything violent, drugs, alcohol or abuse, just white collar crimes (yes, I have priors convictions, but I was stupid and didn't see my actions were affecting my life). I am very truly sorry that I had put my kids thru this and I really plan to make amends to them by becoming a much more better parent. My ex has totally twisted things around (proof that is on the posts I have read that came from him) and totally twisted people to believing that he is the best and not me. I will be making phone calls to one particular person that I know and I will be straightened out the matter with her about it. If anyone needs clarification of anything that I had discussed, please, please free to ask. My biggest question is can he take placement from me because I violated my probation and was taken into custody? Also, since he has them settled in a new school that they love, I have plans to move closer to him so they can continue going to that school. Would I be wise to get him in contempt for doing this without contacting me of them going to a new school and programs? I feel so violated because he has them influenced that they are in a safe environment. Any suggestions of what I can do about this?
Posted by: Renny

Re: Need advice and help on this matter ASAP please - 11/29/11 11:56 PM

You speak of a mediated agreement. Reading between the lines, I assume you got divorced and had primary custody. Then you went to jail and in a mediated agreement that was probably turned into a consent order you gave him more visitation but not primary custody. Then he went about changing schools etc. it sounds like he's in contempt, but you have to be more specific about that mediated agreement. Was it turned into a court order directly or was some other document drafted for the order modifying custody?