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#154921 - 10/17/06 01:54 AM Re: DH went to the deposition hearing today [Re: M5M5]
jsp Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 10/01/05
Posts: 4197
I know I take the conservative approach with money, but if you are paying child support to me that should cover everything (or at least that is how my husband's works). You have to look at your net income, rent, car insurance, utilities, food, clothing, child support, etc. and decide from there what is left over. They you save for emergencies and then from there decide what you can afford as "extras." If you can't afford it, you can't afford it. It's great to want to give kids everything or what you had, but if you can't afford it, they need to understand it.

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#154922 - 10/17/06 01:57 AM Re: DH went to the deposition hearing today [Re: jsp]
M5M5 Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 07/29/05
Posts: 11830
Well we can afford $500 a year @ $41.67 per month...I think...but no more than that. Not right now anyway. I'm hoping DH finds a better/higher paying job next year and maybe we can afford more then.

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#154923 - 10/17/06 01:57 AM Re: DH went to the deposition hearing today [Re: M5M5]
mommy2boys Offline
addict

Registered: 06/02/05
Posts: 497
Loc: Louisiana
Does the $3200 figure include extra curriculars that DH didn't agree to? If so then I would have that deducted from the $3200, otherwise you are setting a precidence that you will pay for anything that she involves the kids in regardless of what DH agrees to or not. Don't agree to $100 a month if you can afford it, I would offer $20 a month and if she says no, tell her you will see her in court because you simply can not afford anymore. I would also get an agreement on the chiro that SD has a second opinion by a Dr of your choice of the medical necessity of the treatment and if the treatment is necessary what activities SD should avoid to not futher injure her back. If the second opinion says that the treatment is medically necessary and soccer should be avoided then refuse to pay for soccer as well as chiro as long as BM continues to involve SD in these activities. If treatment is necessary make sure that there is a limit to the # of visits per year, or what the 2nd opinion Dr states is necessary. Also make sure DH does not agree to the Chiro bills that BM has sent thus far with out receipt from the DR and a copy of SD's medical record from their to be produced in X # of days.

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#154924 - 10/17/06 01:57 AM Re: DH went to the deposition hearing today [Re: M5M5]
Gecko Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 06/02/04
Posts: 20602
Loc: Third rock from the sun
And basically what came out of that is...they are wanting to settle with us. I'm not sure if it's because BM no longer has the money or they realize they don't have a strong case.

---&gt; Probably a little of both.

---&gt; As for what they are offering you...it's bullsh1t! Their ONLY "concession" is repayment...instead of paying each bill in 30 days, you are a constant source of income for the next 10 years.

---&gt; No chiro care unless recommended by two doctors (yours and theirs) and there is a specific therapy plan.

---&gt; No soccer outside of the school's regular athletic program UNLESS father agrees and the cost will be split in proportion to income.

---&gt; Extra-curricular activities are limited to ONE per child at a time. ALL such activities MUST be agreed upon. Cost will be split in proportion to income.

---&gt; You take that $3,200 and you subject the CS overage, bills that she owes you and any expenses that she delibertely incurred over Dad's objections. You then work out a payment schedule of $50 per month.

---&gt; You also make sure that unless it is a medical emergency...she is responsible for any portion of the bill due to do using an "out-of-network" provider.
_________________________
If you air your dirty linen in public, expect people to comment on the skid marks!

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#154925 - 10/17/06 02:00 AM Re: DH went to the deposition hearing today [Re: M5M5]
jsp Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 10/01/05
Posts: 4197
Keep everything you do based on your current income. If your husband gets a raise, don't automatically spend it. You need to save for emergencies, retirement, legal fund (this will not stop till the kids are grown) and for other reasons... take that raise and pretend like you never have it.

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#154926 - 10/17/06 02:04 AM Re: DH went to the deposition hearing today [Re: mommy2boys]
M5M5 Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 07/29/05
Posts: 11830
We already have a second opnion from an orthopedic specialist. He couldn't find any condition..she is a perfectly healthy 11 yr old girl. So we already have that and BM knows it.

The $3200 figure does include extras and everything we are disputing..and those we want taken out if we are to have a settlment of any kind. We are not going to be responsible for all the uncovered chiro thus far or in the future unless a judge orders it.

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#154927 - 10/17/06 02:09 AM Re: DH went to the deposition hearing today [Re: Gecko]
M5M5 Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 07/29/05
Posts: 11830
that sounds great!! I was hoping you would respond to this...you do know your stuff!

Yes all they are offering is a repayment plan for any monies we owe her now and in the future.

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#154928 - 10/17/06 02:10 AM Re: DH went to the deposition hearing today [Re: jsp]
M5M5 Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 07/29/05
Posts: 11830
Yeah that's true...except..if he gets a big raise..CS will be raised lol.

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#154929 - 10/17/06 02:10 AM Re: DH went to the deposition hearing today [Re: M5M5]
AnneB Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 09/21/05
Posts: 3645
M5M5, I am sorry because I feel sure you have posted this 100 times, but I have forgotten. Someone above posted that any extracurricular expenses should come out of CS. How much CS does your H pay under the current order without any medical, etc. added to it?

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#154930 - 10/17/06 02:11 AM Re: DH went to the deposition hearing today [Re: AnneB]
M5M5 Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 07/29/05
Posts: 11830
$607 per month...based on income shares...parenting time (we are also due a decrease in CS but have not sought it), both parents incomes, etc.

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