My husband was married for 30 years and divorced in 1998. The attorneys, and both parties, failed to research the pension and retirement plans for the govt org. where my husband worked. The Attorneys wrote the QDRO in the decree. and after years of battling, my husband just wanted it to end once and for all.
The decree said to name ex spouse as irrevocable beneficiary, even after marriage, no big deal, and he signed,against his better judgment. We married in 2000. and years later, in 2003, my husband retired and went to sign all of the paperwork, which at the time forces all retirees to fill out required docs. Went to name ex as beneficiary and he was told, they cannot pay ex-spouses survivor benefits, will only go to current spouse. He said but my decree says I have to name her. Benefits dept would not allow it. So for two years after retirement, we did not pay her half of his pension, he thought, he did not have to.
Two years later, We then receive a letter in the mail from the Pension plan administrator, written to her attorney that the plan is not a QDRO and is invalid. His ex spouse has now become a mad vindictive person. We have made a proposal to her for a small life ins. policy, to resolve this. Since attorneys wrote everything wrong and we did not know anything for two years. She responded, she'll accept half of the two years back pension payments and only if we, Mr. and Mrs. to sign a promissory note with a lien against our house.....Can she really do this.....I'm not signing over my house.. What rights do we have? can she force me, to give up my rights?