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#204130 - 03/13/07 03:57 AM Re: Can writing mean/nasty letters hurt you in court? [Re: katiefedup]
jil_stevens Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 08/01/06
Posts: 3893
If someone said that and nothing happened, you should still press charges :)

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#204131 - 03/13/07 03:59 AM Re: Can writing mean/nasty letters hurt you in court? [Re: jil_stevens]
katiefedup Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 10/27/05
Posts: 11669
how far would it get? What are the damages?

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#204132 - 03/13/07 04:27 AM Re: Can writing mean/nasty letters hurt you in court? [Re: jil_stevens]
100kay Offline
journeyman

Registered: 09/22/04
Posts: 61
Okay, I went back in my email file and dug out the letter I sent. I started w/ an apology for the request, introduced myself, explained my relationship to the ex; and itemized in dollar amts what I was seeking in delinquent c/s.

It's a long email but if I look w/a critical eye anything that might come close to defamation of character w/b:

* he is delinquent in childsupport
* he flies into a rage toward me and creates chaos
* he stated his income is ($$)...can you provide documentation otherwise?
* can you provide documents of legal dispute you had w/him

[color:blue]does this sound incriminating to you?? [/color]

Btw, my 1st email asked the guy permission to ask him questions about the ex. He responded in the affirmative and said he perfered to be contacted by email.

Based on how mad I am about the current issue, I really am proud of the way I wrote the letter. It is written apologetically and without malice. I stated I could not afford a lawyer and was forced to do research on my own.


Edited by 100kay (03/13/07 04:29 AM)

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#204133 - 03/13/07 06:58 AM Re: Can writing mean/nasty letters hurt you in court? [Re: 100kay]
Gecko Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 06/02/04
Posts: 20602
Loc: Third rock from the sun
Write your heart out...wait two days...and then delete the letter.
_________________________
If you air your dirty linen in public, expect people to comment on the skid marks!

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#204134 - 03/13/07 10:59 AM Re: Can writing mean/nasty letters hurt you in court? [Re: 100kay]
tsl Offline
Pooh-Bah

Registered: 06/24/04
Posts: 2274
I would say he already contacted your X prior to the initial response of go ahead and ask away! Doesn't sound all that bad based on what you wrote here.

You can go through Court and request the Judge to order that guy to turn over X's income statements you know...
_________________________
Duct tape can't fix stupid but it can keep them out of the way."

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#204135 - 03/13/07 12:22 PM Re: Can writing mean/nasty letters hurt you in court? [Re: tsl]
Dee78 Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 06/02/05
Posts: 11820
Loc: TN
I would probably leave out the part about flying into a rage and creating chaos, it really isn't pertinent. You need financial information and he may not provide it if he thinks that it could get nasty.

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#204136 - 03/13/07 12:32 PM Re: Can writing mean/nasty letters hurt you in cou [Re: 100kay]
pueblonative Offline
journeyman

Registered: 03/13/07
Posts: 90
[quote]
I don't really care about that because all I did was ask for his help to aid me in my c/s case. Ex is screaming libal but I don't think that will hold water.

As far as I know, libal means telling lies about someone, correct? I asked for information about his income to support my c/s case - - no lies. I'm sure he will bring this up. [/quote]

There are a couple of reasons why libel won't hold:

1. Statute of limitations is one year from date of original publication or any publication with a "substantial modification"
2. Libel requires malace or--at the best for the plaintiff--negligence.
3. Publication is required, and publication means showing it to a third person. If you were writing to the ex about the ex, that doesn't count. You're the first person, he's the second. The only way it could be considered "publication" is if you wrote the letter about another person.


Point #1 renders the issue moot. Case closed.

Now, can it hurt you? Maybe, but I would hope that a judge on a family court would realize a divorce is not when people are on their finest behavior.


Edited by pueblonative (03/13/07 12:35 PM)

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#204137 - 03/13/07 12:47 PM Re: Can writing mean/nasty letters hurt you in court? [Re: katiefedup]
jil_stevens Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 08/01/06
Posts: 3893
The damages are personal defamation. I'm not sayiing it is enough to win in court, but it falls under the definition of libel.

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#204138 - 03/13/07 02:02 PM Re: Can writing mean/nasty letters hurt you in court? [Re: 100kay]
Susanf31 Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 06/02/05
Posts: 10630
You best defense is to not respond AT ALL. Have your lawyer write ther response. Sounds like you've already filed. You will be going to court. Nothing is going to change that. They are picking a fight with you. Don't give them what they want. If you respond you'll be playing into their hands.

Give any coorespondence they send you to your lawyer.

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#204139 - 03/13/07 02:08 PM Re: Can writing mean/nasty letters hurt you in court? [Re: Susanf31]
Susanf31 Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 06/02/05
Posts: 10630
Also, they can only sue you for slander/libel if you KNOWLINGLY said false statements about another person. "Jennifer Lopez had liposuction" when you knew for a fact that she didn't.

However, relaying first-hand knowledge "he flies into a rage", if you know that to be true based on your own experience, is not libel/slander because it's a true statement. Now he if can show that you knowingly lied about that, which would be very difficult for him to do, then he would have libel/slander.

How do I know? My ex-father-in-law is a child molester. The last time he sent my girls gifts, i returned them unopened with a letter stating that he is to have no contact with my daughters because he is a child molester. He threatened me with a libel/slander lawsuit. I turned it over to my lawyer...who informed him and me that based on family information (his daughter's attempted suicide and his step-daughters acknowledgement that he had molested them), what I said was not knowingly false, therefore, no libel/slander occured.

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