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#21612 - 07/20/05 08:35 PM therapy, counseling, ect ???
MADISON Offline
newbie

Registered: 06/19/05
Posts: 26
ok so this may sound odd...but i have no idea what kind of therapy i need but i just know that something is wrong and i do need some help...letting go issues, trying to cope issues, just trying to hold on...one more day issues, forgetful, just some crazy stuff...would like to get a few opinions on who i would see in the 1st place...can't seem to move on its been 4 yrs and i still feel like all this stuff happened yesterday...i know its odd...but i don't want to go to the wrong person...cause they are all very expensive i'm sure..

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#21613 - 07/20/05 08:53 PM Re: therapy, counseling, ect ??? [Re: MADISON]
Lyn Offline
journeyman

Registered: 06/04/05
Posts: 95
Loc: NJ
MADISON - You're regular doctor may be the best place to start; sounds as if some antidepressants or antianxiety meds might be helpful. Your doctor should also be able to refer you to a good psychologist who should be able to sort out what needs to be addressed in what order and possibly refer you to lower cost group sessions (quite a few churches and hospitals have them). You do need to be ready to work on you tho...they will sympathize to an extent re husband induced trauma, but focus on what you can and need to do for you. Judge ordered my X to pay for such treatment along with most of my legal fees.

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#21614 - 07/20/05 09:00 PM Re: therapy, counseling, ect ??? [Re: MADISON]
Steph13 Offline
journeyman

Registered: 06/07/05
Posts: 99
Madison,
Do you know that the more you talk about it the more you are in the issue, the more you think about it the more you can't let go. It is like you are possessed by this situation. It is the air you breath, the dreams you dream, the food you eat. it is not healthy, you are driving yourself crazy, for 4 years you have done nothing but over preocupy yourself with this tragedy. I tell you now, it is time to let go. Let bygones be bygones.
Make it a conscious decision that you will not think about it anymore. When I quit smoking just a few months ago, I first prayed about it and asked God to help me with it because as a human being I'm weak in the flesh and in the mind. I first told myself that there is no turning back no matter what. and that I will not be a bitch, overstressed, or take it out on anyone. because the ones around me did not deserve it and I did not need to put myself thru it. when the craving came I took a book, went for walk, talked to somoene, or just prayed until the urge is gone. the same with you when ever the though get to you, turn it around and force something else. over an over again. you want to go to therapy, the formula is the same, control your mind, over power the urges, whatever the addition is, because in so many words you are addicted to this situation. you just can't let it go.

You do have a choice, bottom line only you can make yourself right. no amount of couseling is going to help if you dont start by wanting it.

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#21615 - 07/20/05 09:20 PM Re: therapy, counseling, ect ??? [Re: Lyn]
alabama Offline
enthusiast

Registered: 02/14/05
Posts: 228
MADISON...I think Lyn nailed it...go to a doctor...local clinic...excellent place to start...the resources they will have to help you are more than you can imagine...

If money is an issue...call a church...tell them what your situation is and ask if there is anyone that you can talk to...

Help is not going to walk up and introduce itself...you will have to look for it...you will have to ask for it...don't give up...your on a journey now...no turning back...

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#21616 - 07/20/05 09:51 PM Re: therapy, counseling, ect ??? [Re: alabama]
jsmom Offline
newbie

Registered: 05/18/05
Posts: 46
I went to counseling right after my divorce and it was the best thing I ever did for myself. I went to a private person who was also a clergyman. My insurance covered it, but I also know you can go to some agencies at a reduced rate if you don't have insurance. But, ministers are also trained in counseling and they are usually free. You may have to drag yourself there, but after awhile you won't be able to wait until the next visit. It really helps to unload and have someone else give you some perspective and focus. I would also see a medical doctor for a mild anti-depressant. But, do both. Drugs alone will not solve your dilemma. Also, if you haven't already, find a local singles group through a church. I made some wonderful friends that way. We went out to eat, movies, plays, concerts, etc. It gave me something to do and I got to know people who were in my situation. Some of those even include your kids. I was in one group that was so good, the guys volunteered to fix things for the women for free, i.e. car repairs, fences, house repairs. It was great. It really got me through. I have been divorced 4 years also. Occasionally, there's a day here and there, but for the most part, I have moved on. What you do for yourself will help your children and everyone else around you.

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#21617 - 07/20/05 09:54 PM Re: therapy, counseling, ect ??? [Re: alabama]
MADISON Offline
newbie

Registered: 06/19/05
Posts: 26
thanks for the advice...can't believe i didn't think of that...LOL so easy i will call her...and ask who she would recommend...thanks again ...i was looking through phone books...didn't know who to pick...LOL
steph13 i'm not to sure you were understanding what i wrote...i think that this forum is for helping people with their divorce problems...asking for advice, venting and anything else that goes with these divorce issues...at least thats what i thought ...please let me know if i'm wrong...

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#21618 - 07/21/05 01:00 AM Re: therapy, counseling, ect ??? [Re: jsmom]
alabama Offline
enthusiast

Registered: 02/14/05
Posts: 228
Quote:
I would also see a medical doctor for a mild anti-depressant.


MADISON...a hint about prescriptions...ask the doctor for some samples if your budget is very tight...you can say "doctor, thank you for the prescription, would you have any samples on hand that you could give me?"

hang in there MADISON!!...

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#21619 - 07/21/05 01:18 AM I may be wrong....but [Re: alabama]
Melody Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 06/03/04
Posts: 10102
Loc: California
I don't believe an MD can prescribe for psychiatric conditions such as depression, bipolar, etc....I think it has to be a psychiatrist....possibly someone working in conjunction with an MD.

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#21620 - 07/21/05 01:38 AM Re: I may be wrong....but [Re: Melody]
alabama Offline
enthusiast

Registered: 02/14/05
Posts: 228
A general practitioner may indeed prescribe a mild anti-depressant...mild being the key word...

If the GP suspects that a form of clinical depression or other severe symptoms exist the GP will probably not make a prescription at that point...until consultation with specialist as you suggest...

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