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#335709 - 01/12/08 04:34 PM Morality Clause
JMA Offline
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Registered: 01/11/08
Posts: 6
Can anyone explain the detailed concepts behind a Morality clause to me. Is it based on overnight visits only, or can it keep the children from meeting the stbx's new boyfriend or girlfriend.

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#335710 - 01/12/08 08:40 PM Re: Morality Clause [Re: JMA]
Relayer Offline
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Registered: 03/13/07
Posts: 9506
Loc: Moorglade Mover
Quote:
Can anyone explain the detailed concepts behind a Morality clause to me. Is it based on overnight visits only, or can it keep the children from meeting the stbx's new boyfriend or girlfriend.


You can ask for anything you want. Mine has "overnights" although the two idiots are now married and she never followed it anyway.
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#335711 - 01/12/08 08:45 PM Re: Morality Clause [Re: JMA]
freedom123 Offline
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Registered: 05/21/07
Posts: 528
Depends. If the separation is fairly new, you can probably keep them away from the new gf or bf temporarily (unless they have a serious issue...in my case my x's gf just lost permanent custody of her children due to failed drug tests, not cooperating with social workers, and making bad decisions when she had visitation...allowed her 8 year old to drive a 2500 Dodge Ram extended cab on the highway). A friend of mine had a morality clause in his final divorce papers and he couldn't have overnight visits while the child was in his care if he was unmarried. The child could meet his girlfriend though.

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#335712 - 01/13/08 02:12 PM Re: Morality Clause [Re: Relayer]
JMA Offline
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Registered: 01/11/08
Posts: 6
What recourse do you have if she did not follow the clause. If it stated that she can not have overnights when the boyfriend is there, then what can be done about it. IE what could the lawyer/courts do?

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#335713 - 01/13/08 02:16 PM Re: Morality Clause [Re: freedom123]
JMA Offline
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Registered: 01/11/08
Posts: 6
We have been seperated for over a year & 1/2. Can it be stated in the M-clause that the children are not even allowed to meet bf/gf or is it limited to overnights by law? The fact that the gf let the child drive, failed drug tests, etc.. nothing like that in this case. Just a lot of hostility.


Edited by JMA (01/13/08 02:25 PM)

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#335714 - 01/13/08 07:55 PM Re: Morality Clause [Re: JMA]
Debi Offline
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Registered: 06/03/05
Posts: 7157
"We have been seperated for over a year & 1/2. Can it be stated in the M-clause that the children are not even allowed to meet bf/gf or is it limited to overnights by law? The fact that the gf let the child drive, failed drug tests, etc.. nothing like that in this case. Just a lot of hostility. "

Is there any reason other than hostility that you want to add the clause? Who is the hostility between? You and stbx, you and gf, the kids and gf? Would it be affective only until the divorce is final? If it would be in the permenant order is it fair to say the kids could "never" meet a bf/gf? The problem with that is if one parent is in a serious relationship doesn't it stand to reason that you'd want to make sure all parties get along before moving forward? I'm not so much opposed to morality clauses as I am to the idea that one person wants to control what the other can do. I realize you may not want your children being brought up in a way to think that it's okay to cohabitate before marriage but as time goes on they will find out that there are people who do that. You can instill your views on what they should do but you really shouldn't be able to tell anyone else what to do. If you are talking about until the divorce is final then I agree it should be added for now.
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#335715 - 01/14/08 03:05 AM Likely not... [Re: JMA]
almostheaven Offline
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Registered: 07/14/04
Posts: 10468
Loc: West Virginia
It mostly serves to keep them from seeing bad behavior...like mommy or daddy having someone else coming out of their bedroom every morning. But introducing them to boyfriends/girlfriends, isn't generally considered. IF however, they were in the habit of introducing them to a new gf/bf every week, then the court might step in and issue a clause preventing that to continue.
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#335716 - 01/14/08 03:07 AM Re: Morality Clause [Re: JMA]
almostheaven Offline
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Registered: 07/14/04
Posts: 10468
Loc: West Virginia
They'd hold her in contempt IF you could prove the individual spent the night, not just on your say-so, but hard core evidence. And contempt generally means the judge says "Don't do it again." If they do it a second time, the judge may say "Don't do it again", AND issue a small fine or something, but that's about it.
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#335717 - 01/14/08 01:36 PM Re: Morality Clause [Re: almostheaven]
JMA Offline
recently joined

Registered: 01/11/08
Posts: 6
It is I that has the girlfriend, and my stbx is the one that holds the hostility towards me. My girlfriend and I have been seeing each other for a little over a year now, and she wants to be a part of my childrens life. My daughter has already met her, and the stbx lost it. Thus the morality clause. I just want to live my life without anymore control, threats etc. She says that she is going to add the morality clause, as well as adultery. She asked me to leave, no actually she demanded I leave. So I left, met someone and nows she's mad.

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#335718 - 01/14/08 06:19 PM Re: Morality Clause [Re: JMA]
1004SRS Offline
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Registered: 12/11/06
Posts: 5044
Okay - I am mulling this over with my X as well.

I'm not angry that he HAS a gf. I am angry that she sleeps over when he has the kids. I don't think it sets a good example for children.

Anyhoo. How would you enforce it?

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