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#349662 - 02/10/08 05:26 AM Re: will this help to get husband out of house [Re: icwal]
Debi Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 06/03/05
Posts: 7157
It could backfire on you. My x moved out and was told by the courts he could move back in until the house was sold. You stated he admitted he was only staying for financial reasons. That's not something you use to get him out. It's what he uses to get to stay.

I'm sure it sucks to have to live with him at this point but until you go to court and your attorney requests he be ordered to move and the judge actually agrees to it he has as much right to the house as you do. If tomorrow his business was suddenly worth millions would you be as eager to call it even? I know I wouldn't. My guess is you are stuck with him until the divorce is final.
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When we were together, you said you'd die for me. Now, I think it's time you kept your promise.

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#349663 - 02/10/08 08:02 AM Re: will this help to get husband out of house [Re: Debi]
kmich91261 Offline
member

Registered: 01/15/08
Posts: 119
Loc: Washington, USA
Quote:
It could backfire on you. My x moved out and was told by the courts he could move back in until the house was sold. You stated he admitted he was only staying for financial reasons. That's not something you use to get him out. It's what he uses to get to stay.

I'm sure it sucks to have to live with him at this point but until you go to court and your attorney requests he be ordered to move and the judge actually agrees to it he has as much right to the house as you do. If tomorrow his business was suddenly worth millions would you be as eager to call it even? I know I wouldn't. My guess is you are stuck with him until the divorce is final.


So the question I have then is what happens if STBX has been out of the house for almost 4 months and wants back in the house (STBX has never brought this up in court though but verbally to me)? STBX up and left, went underground, as I explained earlier in the post. The day after STBX went underground I changed the locks on the house after one of 4 drunken brother-in-laws that live in town told me "to watch my back." People do stupid things under stress and didn't want to risk one night waking up to possible 4 of STBX's brothers in my house beating the crap out of me just because. The way the temp order is set up is we each have our son EO week. The intent and agreement in court papers are to sell the house however I'm checking refinancing the house into my name. Does anybody know what the chances of STBX getting back into the house are?


Edited by kmich91261 (02/10/08 08:03 AM)
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"Get busy living or get busy dying." Shawshank Redemption

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#349664 - 02/10/08 02:44 PM Re: will this help to get husband out of house [Re: kmich91261]
almostheaven Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 07/14/04
Posts: 10468
Loc: West Virginia
You better do something LEGALLY. Cause changing the locks ain't it. He could bust down the door to gain entry and you can't do a thing about it. Afterall, it's HIS house too, until a court says otherwise. He just proves that to the cops and it's so...he broke his own door, they leave.
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#349665 - 02/10/08 04:39 PM Re: will this help to get husband out of house [Re: almostheaven]
DeeCee Offline
addict

Registered: 10/08/07
Posts: 420
In some ways I do find my this humorous..my stbx (maybe because he's hot headed and maybe because he is spoilt..who knows?) his initial action when he first wanted a divorce was to threaten me to sign a SA...and all he kept saying was "I want you out by 2 months after signing it!!" Only when I turned the tables and said no...I'm taking a lawyer...he filed after thumping his chest..and now I do recall him saying "it's going to take longer if we have to use a lawyer" Somehow my stbx envisioned I was going to be out quickly and him and his OW in in a span of two months...here we are in February and we're just at the beginning of a long long process. I imagine in his twisted sociopathic mind he feels angrier it hasn't gone according to his plans. And now it's him who is rolling his travel bag out to sleep elsewhere..Karma does exist.

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#349666 - 02/10/08 05:29 PM Re: will this help to get husband out of house [Re: kmich91261]
Debi Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 06/03/05
Posts: 7157
So the question I have then is what happens if STBX has been out of the house for almost 4 months and wants back in the house (STBX has never brought this up in court though but verbally to me)? STBX up and left, went underground, as I explained earlier in the post. The day after STBX went underground I changed the locks on the house after one of 4 drunken brother-in-laws that live in town told me "to watch my back." People do stupid things under stress and didn't want to risk one night waking up to possible 4 of STBX's brothers in my house beating the crap out of me just because. The way the temp order is set up is we each have our son EO week. The intent and agreement in court papers are to sell the house however I'm checking refinancing the house into my name. Does anybody know what the chances of STBX getting back into the house are?

That's basically what happened to me. We had to live together for an aditional 4 months until the house sold. It was hell on earth.
_________________________
When we were together, you said you'd die for me. Now, I think it's time you kept your promise.

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#349667 - 02/10/08 05:30 PM Re: will this help to get husband out of house [Re: almostheaven]
Debi Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 06/03/05
Posts: 7157
You better do something LEGALLY. Cause changing the locks ain't it. He could bust down the door to gain entry and you can't do a thing about it. Afterall, it's HIS house too, until a court says otherwise. He just proves that to the cops and it's so...he broke his own door, they leave.

kmich is still a man AH.
_________________________
When we were together, you said you'd die for me. Now, I think it's time you kept your promise.

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#349668 - 02/10/08 05:40 PM Re: will this help to get husband out of house [Re: Debi]
kmich91261 Offline
member

Registered: 01/15/08
Posts: 119
Loc: Washington, USA
Debi, I try to keep gender neutral since my opinion is sometimes people are tainted in their response when the posting says he or she. On the temp orders though I've been awarded the house but I'm assuming that could be changed by the court.


Edited by kmich91261 (02/10/08 05:45 PM)
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"Get busy living or get busy dying." Shawshank Redemption

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#349669 - 02/10/08 06:02 PM Re: will this help to get husband out of house [Re: Debi]
PhoenixRising Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 01/05/07
Posts: 3681
Loc: New York
Debi,

The legal reasoning for not making one spouse leave; is that he/she has no place to go.

He/she already owns/rents a home and has a right to it..

If your STBX left for 4mths AND you can PROVE that he has an abode that he has access to THEN you MIGHT have a case depending on what state you live in...

You might not win such a case in PA but NYS; they look at what other types of living arrangements are available for each party and the circumstances involved.

You should probably file for "exclusive use and occupancy" as right now it is the status quo.

If STBX does decide to break down the door and to move back in; you wouldn't be able to do anything about it until you could get a court date. And even then you would have more of an uphill battle than if you took care of this now.

NOT saying your petition would be awarded! But if you have this worry; you should probably try to do something legally about it.
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Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle. --Plato

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#349670 - 02/10/08 06:08 PM Re: will this help to get husband out of house [Re: PhoenixRising]
Pops_IL_CP_Dad Offline
addict

Registered: 02/02/08
Posts: 406
Loc: Illinois
I have a friend living in WI. He moved out of his rented home leaving his son and wife to stay. A couple of months later, he went there (don't remember why) and when he went to the door, he could see her and her BF making out on the couch. He broke a window to get in. (he felt justified -- he was still paying the rent and his child was asleep in another room). He did a lot of screaming and yelling at her, told BF to leave.

She called the cops. They arrested him for breaking and entering and charged him with domestic violence.

He was told by his judge that once you move out and establish another residence, you have no right to the original residence, whether or not you are paying the rent.

That's Wisconsin...
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Focus on what is legally relevant, not morally indignant or petty.

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#349671 - 02/10/08 07:20 PM Re: will this help to get husband out of house [Re: Pops_IL_CP_Dad]
DeeCee Offline
addict

Registered: 10/08/07
Posts: 420
So basically the bottom line is unless you feel threaten physically and you can file for a restraining order (not as a tactic though but because you truly feel you are endangered) each spouse has rights to their domain if they haven't 'officially' moved out...Accepting that as a premise will save yourself the mental stress of trying to get them out or the through the drama of changing locks... wait for the divorce. It's going to be impossible to provethat the spouse is paying rent of the stbx's new gf/bf.

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