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#349692 - 03/02/08 12:36 AM Re: will this help to get husband out of house [Re: almostheaven]
2Gr8Kdz84 Offline
newbie

Registered: 02/23/08
Posts: 37
icwal - with all due respect, you are missing the legal boat. i'm new to all this too - we are set for our nominal hearing in April after two court dates to resolve TRO. You fel very strongly about what you (and many others) consider moral issues - problem is, the courts don't. Here's my issue: stbx and i always agreed we would fund our children's higher education. One is half way through an expensive private college; the other has aspirations of the same. The way we established our assets, if we simply split 50/50 and stbx chooses to not fund college, it ain't gonna happen. I raised the issue to the judge. PhoenixRising correctly scolded me. The judge said simply, in my state "college is a moral obligation not a legal one - it is not part of this discussion". Basically, my daughter, age 19, is not a factor in any discussion involving me and my stbx. I find that as shocking as you find adultery or smoking pot or any other "moral" issue. It's hard to swallow, but the quicker you do the better off you'll be. I have no idea of your situation other than what i can gleen from these posts, but if you even imply anything negative about your stbx to your kids, you're doing them a disservice. Even the smallest arrow shot will pass through him and pierce your children. My stbx has some serious issues - i refuse to bring them into my discussions with my daughters (the younger of which i currently have temp custody of (not common for a man in my great state)). Besides, i'm not perfect either. You appear clearly in the anger stage. hopefully now that a few weeks have passed since your last post, if you read this, you have gotten a handle on that. best of luck to you...more importantly, to your kids.

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#349693 - 03/02/08 04:07 AM Re: will this help to get husband out of house [Re: 2Gr8Kdz84]
icwal Offline
enthusiast

Registered: 11/19/07
Posts: 334
I totally understand that the law doesn't care about morals, however I think they are just as important as other aspects of raising your children are. Thats the point I was trying to make out of all of this. It seems like things are not cordial between you and your STBX, but could you imagine how things would be if you were still living together. So even though my statement to my daughter about her dad was probably out of line, him doing the things day in and day out that are so morally wrong (and not even trying to hide it) are far more damaging to her than my statement was. Good luck to you also and thanks for your comments.

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