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#606629 - 02/07/10 02:28 AM Re: Bonus payout [Re: raider]
Cassie23 Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 10/07/05
Posts: 14784
27k (bonus) plus 110k (salary) equal total of 137k Father
Subtract 18k for CS end up with 119k

45k (income) plus 10k (her bonus) plus 18k (what she receives in CS/year with a 50/50 split equals 73k Mother

Although this doesn't take into account father pays 30% of his bonus to Mom.

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#606630 - 02/07/10 02:41 AM Re: Bonus payout [Re: Goodmom]
Cassie23 Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 10/07/05
Posts: 14784
You could be correct on this Goodmom, maybe W wanted this and that, Jeff ok'ed it and that was that. Mediator didn't really have to be a neutral party and mediate because Jeff agreed to what she first suggested.

MY question is at mediation do they give you the CS guidelines? I would assume they HAVE to. I mean there has to be a foundation. I guess Jeff didn't consider he shouldn't have to pay FULL CS when he has teh children EQUAL time.

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#606631 - 02/07/10 12:28 PM Re: Bonus payout [Re: Cassie23]
Goodmom Offline
Pooh-Bah

Registered: 06/17/07
Posts: 2202
[quote]You apparently have never been in mediation where the mediator actually takes the side of one spouse. My brother's mediator told him that what his W wanted was absolutely fair and reasonable and it was what the court would order. Brother spoke to me first, and thank god. I told him to mention the CSSA to the mediator. He did and the mediator had no clue what he was talking about. CSSA stood for Child Support Standards Act. My brother told him he was having a copy emailed to him and that he would bring it at his next meeting. He did and the mediator completely changed his position on what was 'fair' and reasonable. [/quote]

The mediator isn't supposed to give legal advice. That's what lawyers are for. The mediator is there to present the offer between the two sides and try to get them to agree. Telling your brother that the court would absolutely order it was overstepping his/her bounds as a mediator.

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#606632 - 02/07/10 12:34 PM Re: Bonus payout [Re: Cassie23]
Goodmom Offline
Pooh-Bah

Registered: 06/17/07
Posts: 2202
[quote]You could be correct on this Goodmom, maybe W wanted this and that, Jeff ok'ed it and that was that. Mediator didn't really have to be a neutral party and mediate because Jeff agreed to what she first suggested.

MY question is at mediation do they give you the CS guidelines? I would assume they HAVE to. I mean there has to be a foundation. I guess Jeff didn't consider he shouldn't have to pay FULL CS when he has teh children EQUAL time. [/quote]

Given how much he is making, I doubt he is paying full child support. But he is paying the higher percentage, which is common when you make more than the other party.

It's not the mediators job to give the parties the child support guidelines. Their job is to get an agreement.

Anybody who goes into mediation without first learning what the child support guidelines are is just plain stupid. As soon as my ex and I had a 4 way scheduled with our lawyers to try and come up with an agreement, I read the child support guidelines. Because child support is pretty much going to be what the guidelines state unless both parties agree otherwise. It's not as negotiable as some people like to think it is.

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#606633 - 02/07/10 03:11 PM Re: Bonus payout [Re: Goodmom]
Cassie23 Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 10/07/05
Posts: 14784
I always thought that anyone who goes through mediation SHOULD have a lawyer look over the agreement before signing it and making it a CO. It's too bad Jeff assumed that the agreement was fair.

In my brother's case- he felt as though he was being railroaded into agreeing to something that wasn't fair. It was only when he brought the CSSA in, that the mediator changed his story.

They also are back in court now, because his X wants more money.

Hopefully Jeff's lawyer let's him know if he is paying close to guidelines or way beyond (given their circumstances of incomes and equal parenting time)?

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#606634 - 02/07/10 04:10 PM Re: Bonus payout [Re: Cassie23]
gr8Dad Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 06/07/04
Posts: 31800
Has anyone consider that the ONLY reason her "threat" of no 50/50 and not seeing the kids only worked because she knew she could DO that through the courts?

And isn't it a shame THAT statement couldn't be used to show that she is willing to use the KIDS to get MONEY?

Anyone else see the ex as a money grubbing B!TCH?
_________________________
Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...

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#606635 - 02/07/10 08:50 PM Re: Bonus payout [Re: gr8Dad]
JennyLynn Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 07/14/05
Posts: 31656
&lt;&lt;Anyone else see the ex as a money grubbing B!TCH?
&gt;&gt;

Yes :)

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#606636 - 02/07/10 09:05 PM Re: Bonus payout [Re: JennyLynn]
Sherron Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 11/25/06
Posts: 20729
"Anyone else see the ex as a money grubbing B!TCH? "

I dunno. I asked for everything and then some so I'd have room to negotiate. I never anticipated ex would just sign off on the papers.

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#606637 - 02/07/10 09:23 PM Re: Bonus payout [Re: Sherron]
JennyLynn Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 07/14/05
Posts: 31656
good point Sherron....I suppose that mom could have felt the same way?

I didn't ask for more than I wanted, I didn't want him to get screwed. Maybe that was my problem :)

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#606638 - 02/08/10 12:11 AM Re: Bonus payout [Re: JennyLynn]
Cassie23 Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 10/07/05
Posts: 14784
I would be more along the same lines. CS is about MONEY to SUPPORT the children. Who thinks a parent who has her kids HALF time/completely equal needs $1500 (and another $600 with bonus) a month for CS?

My brother's X whined that he should pay 1/2 of winter clothes, entertainment, Halloween costumes, etc. after the CS agreement was done. So he was paying CS PLUS the other stuff because "it was for the kids" and she made him feel bad that he wasn't contributing. He IS contributing with CS. Sometimes parents are so worried about their X looking at them as someone who isn't for the kids they go beyond and the X takes advantage :( Sucks big time.

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