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#743006 - 02/08/12 03:18 AM Confused please help
trs Offline

recently joined

Registered: 02/08/12
Posts: 1
My husband and i seperated over a year ago i recently filed for divorce.We have 3 children. He told me he was changing jobs and moved to (Az) and has been living in a house with 1 single woman and her 3 kids and a married couple (he says as a room mates) but i have found a posting on facebook put up dec 31st with one of his supposed roomate calling him baby and saying thier together.. this is after a year of seperation. Is he commiting adultery even though we've been seperated for so long. i know in SC him living in a house with a woman is considered that, does it make a difference that he's not in SC anymore? i have no proof of adultery and he denies it.. i just have a couple facebook posts i printed out that she put up calling him baby and saying he was her dude.. PLEASE HELP

#743007 - 02/09/12 05:22 AM Re: Confused please help [Re: trs]
Renny Offline


Registered: 09/24/11
Posts: 479
If its adultery, it's adultery whether he's in SC or not. I dont mean to be insensitive, but if you are separated what does it matter if he is having relations with other women? Was there an understanding that you would get back together after some time apart?

#743008 - 02/14/12 12:32 PM Re: Confused please help [Re: Renny]
javajunkiee Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 06/02/08
Posts: 3200
Loc: SC
I'm in SC. Did you file fault or no-fault? Were you legally separated with papers on file with the court? If so, is there any language in the legal sep. papers that say something to the effect that "both parties shall live as single and neither party will hold the other responsible for ..." ?

If he's still a legal resident of this state, yes he's committing adultery. Whether a judge would care at this point is unknown, and a judge is definitely not going to use *someone else's* fb posts as proof of it.

Furthermore, since you've met the legal requirements to file for no-fault in this state, going for fault is fairly well pointless unless you think you're entitled to a huge alimony payment. Those are not a given in ANY situation because of a lot of factors, not limited to:
1. Length of the marriage. (a couple of years won't cut it)
2. Need of the receiving party. (you've been without his income for the last year (?) )
3. Income of the payor. (you can't get blood out of a turnip)

Child support for 3 kids will certainly be ordered, so he'll be obligated to help you support his kids. If the marriage is over however, and with the limited info you've shared, he is not obligated to help support you.

Best advice I can offer is to get a couple of free consultations with family law atty's in your area. KEEP IN MIND: Lawyers are in the business to make $$$$ - one that promises you the moon better have a track record of DELIVERING it to other clients. Research their track record before hiring one - with him in another state and you with 3 kids to support, the last thing you need to do is pay big $$ to a fast-talking lawyer with no clue.
Marriage doesn't come with a money-back guarantee.

#743009 - 03/11/12 01:09 AM Re: Confused please help [Re: javajunkiee]
connie60 Offline


Registered: 08/28/10
Posts: 101
The problem is with adultery in SC. You have to have proof!!! Meaning, pictures, or him admitting it. These days they dont seem to worry to much about adultery. My attorney told me that it wont make much difference and the only way to get the proper proof is to hire a private det., Then you get in court and the judge will more than likely just skim over it. Its not worth the money.....unless, he has millions, and you have money to spare...I know it hurts, and it very wrong, but there are some things we cant do much about. It will all come back to him and bite him in the..... well you know!!! Just think of it that way, it makes it easier....

#743010 - 03/11/12 01:13 AM Re: Confused please help [Re: connie60]
connie60 Offline


Registered: 08/28/10
Posts: 101
I have an excellent Attorney and have paid her big bucks. I have been keeping her informed of everything by sending her updated letters. I got a letter in the mail the other day, from her. It read that my phone # had been dissconnected,lol... So, i just wrote her back and told her that i have had that # for 6 months now, and that i had given all of my new info. in the last letter after i moved. So, at this point, i am wondering if she is even reading these letters??? I have gone through all of the letters i have sent her and i am about to write her another with all of the important info. on it.


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