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#744045 - 02/27/12 01:24 AM relocation with no custody arrangment
tivomivo1 Offline

recently joined

Registered: 02/27/12
Posts: 1
Ok, I will try to make reading this as painless as possible...
Me and my X were never married, have NO custody arrangment, as he refused to my temp visitation schedule i offered him until we go to court.
Child is 14 months old.
I have been her primary caregiver since day 1 and the bond between us is incredible.
We have court scheduled in 13 days to figure out rights/responsibilites.
He has excersiced virtually NO parenting time since she has been born.
I got accepted to a school in South Carolina, and really want to move.
I cannot afford the high cost of living in New England ( I am in VT)
If I was to start school fulltime here, I could not afford to go to school full time, send my child to daycare full time, and work full time to pay rent/utilites/every other bill. I wouldnt even be breaking even every month, I'd be going deeper into debt.
I got accepted into a great radiology program, and am planning on living with a family that has been my second family since forever, they have a stable home, careers, etc....they live a good life and are good people. I can work as a nanny part time down there which will allow me to bring my child so I dont have to pay for daycare...
My family from VT is also planning to retire to South Carolina, which is the only other family that my child has known since being in VT, and it is just my immediate family (Mother and Father)
My question is, should I relocate before court so I enter court saying I live here, I do this, etc...etc....and have visitation set from that status quo...or will they order me to move back to vermont. I am fine having open visitation with her father, allowing him to see her anytime he wants to come down that way and any time I am up that way, and having scheduled time also....
My other option is to petition the courts to relocate but we have NO court orders as it ism so I dont know if that is even an option. Any insight is appreciated, or any suggestions on what YOU would do. Thanks <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> [color:"purple"] [/color]

Edited by tivomivo1 (02/27/12 01:28 AM)

#744046 - 03/02/12 11:23 PM Re: relocation with no custody arrangment [Re: tivomivo1]
javajunkiee Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 06/02/08
Posts: 3200
Loc: SC
First off, its standard that the parent who moves pays the transportation costs. Punishing the non-moving parent by making them pay the travel costs isn't something the courts like to order.

If you can't prove that it's in the best interests of your daughter to relocate (read: your move outweighs the importance of her developing a relationship with her father) she will be required to stay in VT. If you move anyways, he'll be able to petition for full custody.

Your opportunities for school, where your family *intends* to retire, etc etc doesn't mean squat over the relationship between the two of them.

With that said if you can prove he hasn't exercised his time by *his* choice, not because you've denied it, your chances will improve immensely.
Marriage doesn't come with a money-back guarantee.


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