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#769382 - 01/28/15 12:08 AM Military Spouse Divorce
chriscshunter Offline

recently joined

Registered: 01/27/15
Posts: 2
I'm a disabled veteran married to active duty USCG member for 2 years with no children in NY State. She has been on anti-depressants for over a year now, and has been very violent since.

Last year in July we got in a verbal altercation and she unexpectedly swung at my face in the dark and broke my nose and I filed a restricted report through the local military base. A few months later she became violent so I locked her outside the house and she beat 2000$ in damages on my car and my neighbor saw the whole thing and told me if I ever needed a witness that they would act as one.

Earlier this month she saw an old chat log online with me and a female friend about the things going on in our marriage and started breaking items while I was at work and threatened to destroy everything if I didn't leave my job. When I got home she had caused close to another 2000$ in damages to my electronics.

After I thought things had calmed down and I had worked the whole night before so I took a nap upstairs in a locked room on the couch. I woke up to her kicking the door down and punching me in the face and taking a chair to my back when I rolled over to try and protect myself. She then pulled out a carpenter knife and threatened to cut my computer monitors if I didn't give my laptop and passwords.

I grabbed the laptop and ran downstairs into the bedroom while she chased me with the knife. I barricaded the door with the bed and called 911. I recorded her beating on the door until the police arrived. I made a police report with all the information above, but didn't press charges since they USCG was going to keep her on base.

The landlord became aware of what had happened and saw the damages to the property which he billed as 900$. The day after CGIS came to my door and was investigating the incident. I gave them the police report and mentioned the restricted report. With this information CGIS interrogated her and she admitted in the report to the assault and destruction of property. After that I was unable to communicate with my wife for the last 3 weeks due to the USCG investigation and she was ordered to not communicate with me until the 3rd of February.

4 days back I had the sheriff show up at my door and serve me an order of protection placed against me for 2nd degree harassment for absolutely no reason as we had been unable to communicate anyway. The order basically stating that I need to be civil whenever communicating. I went to court this morning and got to communicate with my Wife. She stated to the judge that she wanted to get a divorce. I requested the she drop the order of protection against me as I had done nothing wrong. She stated that she would not drop the order and will pursue divorce, so the judge is taking this order of protection to trail on April 2nd.

Originally I wasn't interested in pursuing charges against her, I just wanted a divorce and to move on as quickly as I could to my family in Georgia and move on with my life. Now that it seems she wants to drag this out and act as if I am the one who has done wrong I am ready to defend myself and fight back. I am considering coming back at her with a restraining order for assault and destruction of property.

So lawyers up here want 100$ anytime I want to talk, I'm trying to go through the VA and get some legal advice and I really would like some help. I am currently on disability leave from work due to this incident and I had surgery on my nose as well, so I am only collecting half my pay. She has not paid the rent or helped with the bills for this month and her name is on the lease and she should be held liable. I have called countless resources with people that act like they truly want to help but in the end haven't helped me.

So my questions:
Can/How do I obtain the CGIS investigation report?
Should I file for a restraining order? And what will it cost?
As a military spouse isn't she suppose to provide me with some part of her income? Especially under the circumstances...
Is she liable for at least half the cost of damages to me? And how do I obtain them?
What do I need to do to obtain rent and money for bills from her?
What else do I need to do to help myself?

#769383 - 01/28/15 12:45 AM Re: Military Spouse Divorce [Re: chriscshunter]
Redlegg Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 10/06/06
Posts: 27903 But like it says, she cannot be ordered to pay it, only disciplined if she does not. Not knowing how the Command is, you would have to decide if the way to go is through them, or through another office to bring that up. They will not get involved in your divorce, except if a court order is involved. You should either call the Cost Guard Police, or CGIS, and ask them how to get a copy. As far as everything else, you should do what you think you need to, to protect yourself. The restraining order is going to court, so work with it there.

#769384 - 01/28/15 06:34 PM Re: Military Spouse Divorce [Re: Redlegg]
chriscshunter Offline

recently joined

Registered: 01/27/15
Posts: 2
I have called CGIS and even the investigator that gave me his number and nobody is returning my calls.

#769385 - 01/28/15 07:37 PM Re: Military Spouse Divorce [Re: chriscshunter]
Redlegg Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 10/06/06
Posts: 27903
Then it is time to walk in and make the request. If that does not work you can notify the IG, The installation Command, your Congressman. Bottom line is you might be kicking a hornets nest, or it may take time and patience, but you can get the report.

#769386 - 04/22/15 03:42 PM Re: Military Spouse Divorce [Re: chriscshunter]
AnneSaxton Offline

recently joined

Registered: 04/22/15
Posts: 1
You need to act as soon as possible as she can charge you with other things.If she wants divorce there shouldn't be any problems but about your CGIS report its a tough job.But you should try giving them a call about the report.And the divorce lawyer torrance will be helpful to you about your divorce and also prove to be helpful about your expenses on case,they can help you regarding your issue of charges on you.There is also a need to get the payments from your wife about the destruction she had made to the property and half of the money for bills.These lawyers will help you t get you out of trouble and help you get you claim of money and bills.

Edited by AnneSaxton (04/22/15 03:44 PM)


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