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#771571 - 03/17/16 05:18 PM parenting across state lines
movingonmom Offline

recently joined

Registered: 03/17/16
Posts: 1
I am not divorced yet, but I have already filed. I am originally from a neighboring state and I desperately want to move back there with my kids. The drive is 4 hours. I am thinking through all of the pros and cons. I imagine it will be more difficult for the kids when it comes time for them to see their dad. They wont be able to participate in weekend activities and such. Can someone that is in the situation please tell me what it is like to co-parent across state lines. I really need some perspective!!

#771572 - 03/21/16 02:11 PM Re: parenting across state lines [Re: movingonmom]
Redlegg Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 10/06/06
Posts: 27903
I think you have the most important perspective, and just need to take a look at it. Does not sound like Dad is a bad guy, so how would you feel if he were doing the move ? It is easy to say, they will be better off, which they may be, it might be a better school, G'parents, etc, but what about their Dad. I think it is a decision that should be talked about with Dad. He will soon no longer be a husband, but he will always be their Dad. Unless of course there are things going on that make them worse off if they are near him.

#771573 - 04/01/16 08:20 AM Re: parenting across state lines [Re: movingonmom]
MinnesotaMom Offline

old hand

Registered: 01/05/11
Posts: 969
What does your attorney say? Out of state moves are very difficult to achieve. In most cases, the primary parent is the one that stays behind. From what you wrote, you would get every other weekend and pay for all transportation costs. Has your attorney discussed this with you?

#771574 - 04/02/16 01:19 AM Re: parenting across state lines [Re: MinnesotaMom]
SRS Offline

Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 11/05/10
Posts: 2585
You can do out of state moves with your kids. I did it. It isn't impossible.

All of that said, does Dad take his scheduled visitation? Is Dad involved at school or with extra circulars? If so, this will be next to impossible unless he agrees to it.

Look at your motivation for moving. Your kids won't want to travel 4 hours each way every weekend. It just isn't practical.

My kids are supposed to go visit Dad every other holiday. He chooses not to take his time. Every so often he will come to see them on their turf. When he does want them, it is up to me to get them to him.

#771575 - 04/02/16 11:54 AM Re: parenting across state lines [Re: SRS]
MinnesotaMom Offline

old hand

Registered: 01/05/11
Posts: 969
"You can do out of state moves with your kids. I did it. It isn't impossible."

Your situation is different. With the OP, it sounds like they live in the same household and co-parent now.


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