I have been battling the court system AND my ex for several years now. The last court action left me to supervused visitations only, due to an allegation of abusing the children "every time they visit" (according to my lying ex and not only her statement but what she claims our child told her). However, when the judge ordered supervised visitations - due to alleged abuse, he didn't launch any investigation in to the alleged abuse (little did I know, until the judges changed during their annual cycle, that judges are "mandated reporters"!!!!). I repeatedly asked the judge to investigate the allegation, even offering any number of ways to do so, pleading with the judge to do "something" (I was NOT being bossy in my requests, denanding the judge do X or do Y, but I was pleading that he *either* speak wirh our oldest child in chambers, OR refer us to the court appoibnted on-site mediator and have that person interview our oldest child (our oldest wasn't even very old at the time 8, and our youngest who was 6 at this point is autistic so isn't verbal now let alone back them) but the fact is my ex claimed our oldest told her that I abuse them everytime and the judge wasn't interewsted in doing ANYTHING to investigate the validity of the allegation!
Also, not only did he abuse his judicial power (and violate his mandated reporter status) but during the same court session he ordered child support, using the california calculator to make his ruling - HOWEVER, not only did my ex say "he doesn't see them as much as the existing order allows him to", and without any further discussion used 2% as my allocated visitation time, but he also used my ex's disability income (which is about 1/2 the amount of a min wage 40 hour a week job, but it is customary that judges use min wage 40 hr per wk income as a minimum figure to determine support! So, without so much as a single peobing question gave me the secobd leadt amount of time that he could have given me and misrepresented the amount that would normalky be used by allowing her to sit on her deriar all day long and get half od my income for doing so (instead of the typical response that would normally tell an under-earner to go out and find work - you see, my ex has a 40% veterans disability, which means she is 60% CAPABLE of working, so she can go out and get a part time job and be "earning" a full time income! I on the other hand, have been determined (also by the veteran's administration) to be "unable to maintain gainful employment", which means i can't work, but I am supposed to pay half my disability to a woman who is 60% capable of working!
This is just the icing on the cake of "Female Law Court" bias! When our divorce\separation first started SHE SLAPPED ME! and the police came and TOOK ME AWAY! She was not only granted a restraining order, but that judge ordered me TWICE AS MUCH anger management as her, and she slapped me for "turning away from her while she was still talking to me" (this is actually exactly what she wrote in her request for r.o. (though I changed the tense so you would understand why she said she slapped me).
Now, during the first actual court session that I appeared at (I was in jail when she was granted a temp ro) I was handed a full sized sheet of paper that had a specific CA state law on it regarding domestic violence and child custody, and it said there is a "rebuttabke pressumption" of custody whereas the person who instigates d.v. does not receive custody. Now, I am certainly no Law professional, I used to work in IT, so I am fairly smart, so I can deduce that "rebuttable" means you can argue against something and "presumption" basically means a "default" ruling, basically a defaukt ruling that can be argue why this defaukt ruling shouldn't apply in this case. Well, did they presume to give me custody, as tge vuctim of d.v. NOPE! Of course, I couldn't technically be called a victim of dv because fespite multiple pleadings with the police they would not file the proper paperwork so that the D.A. could press assault charges against her for slapping me! But, was their any "argunent" made as to why she should get custody despite admitting to the court WHY she slapped me?! Nope, of course not, because this is "Female Law Court", and the first judge that saw our case tild me that she would never give me custody of the children, if she (the first FEMALE judge) ever saw fit to remove custody from my ex, she would place thwm with Child Services! The judge who made the above rukings - when I reiterated to him the exact words that my ex used in expkaining why she slapped me, his response was "you probably deserved it"!!!
So, I have sit back these past couple of years that I haven't seen my kids and not only found all of this ibformation about how more men are now abused by their female partners than are women, and how society doesn't see them as victims (even watched a YouTube video yesterday with a "social experiment" was done. A male and female actor\actress was being filmed, the first part of the video the man was abusing the woman and in every instance that they did this - different times different places, there was always somebody stepping in to protect the woman, but when she did the exact same thing to the male actor, slapping him around, etc. there was only one case where somebody stepped in and it was another man who slapped the man who was being abused by the woman!). So, I kept searching and reading how male victims of abuse are not only marginalized (said they aren't victims like this judge did to me, and like the cops who refused to list my ex as an assailant) but they are often times blamed for the assault and could wind up being in trouble (as I was, when I was throwb in jail) for defending themselves! There was even one case where a man webt in to an ER multipke times, telling the ER their injuries were from DV, but nothing happened, well, eventually the man was stabbed to death and his brother is now picking up the mantle and advocating for male vixtims of dv.
But alas, the grassroots movement (and media recognition) is all happening in the UK, as those were the links that I found, but I couldn't find much of anything about here in the good ol USA. We just must not care as much about our men, yet.
Okay, I know I have rambled on, but I wanted to make my point clear that I am a male victim of DV who has been further vixtimized by a complacant and conpliant judicial system that already views mother as the "best" option for raising children (even when the father submits reports that the children have a less then 33% attebdance record at their *SPECIAL NEEDS* school!) In fact, none of my complaints have ever been "cobsidered" or reviewed in court. I accused my ex of stealing from our disabled son's disability, and the judge didn't even ask me if I had proof or anything, it wad summarily "dismissed" by not even being acknowledgefd during court!
My question is this... I am being brought up on charges of cobtempt of court for not paying child support, my defense is all of the above argunents, but mainly the fact that the judge did not properly calculate the suppirt AND the fraudulant (reaf perjury) accusation she leveled against me that the judge refused to investigate - to add insukt to injury, not only was there no other proof other than her accusation and what she claimed our son said to her) but she requested a move away which did finally launch a custody evaluation, and the evaluator denied her moveaway and recommended i be reunited with the children, but the judge ruled no moveaway, however said that there is "no evidence to support a change in custody\visitations". Again, I am no Law professional, but isn't this expecting "work product" from the evakuator, when the evaluator is only expected to provide a recommebdation based on her work product?